Some people think that having a university degree is the best way to secure a good job. However, others believe skills and experience are more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Nowadays, some
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
views
Correct subject-verb agreement
view
show examples
that having a great
degree
is
a
Change the article
the
show examples
best
approach
to
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
a career,
others
Correct word choice
while others
show examples
prefer to practice some
skills
and background. Both of them have their own superior
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
interior
Fix the agreement mistake
interiors
show examples
. In
this
essay, I will do some explainations, and demonstrate my point of view. To get a job, some people agree
with
Change preposition
that
show examples
a possible
approach
is to get an education at school, and
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
reach a
university
degree
. First of all,
an
Change the article
a
show examples
university
degree
provide
Change the verb form
provides
show examples
a structured education that covers a broad range of knowledge, including theoretical and practical elements. It gives students a solid foundation in their field, which can be crucial for more complex professions,
for instance
, medicine, law and engineering. Those majors require theories and
paticular
Correct your spelling
particular
skills
, and
university
Add an article
the university
show examples
will provide
those requirement
Change the determiner
that requirement
those requirements
show examples
.
Secondly
,
degree
Add an article
the degree
a degree
show examples
is a symbol of qualifications. Employers who are in some competitive or specialized fields, like
doctor
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doctors
show examples
,
requiring
Wrong verb form
require
show examples
a
degree
as a minimum qualification, which means employees
has abilities
Wrong verb form
have the ability
show examples
to handle a challenging program.
In addition
,
university
environments offer students the chance to build
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
valuable professional networks, connecting them with professors, industry experts, and fellow students who may help to find job
oppotunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
after
graguation
Correct your spelling
graduation
.
Thus
, it is necessary to get a
university
degree
. Other people prefer another alternative
approach
is to learn some special
skills
and to increase the experience.
Firstly
, some companies prioritize practical
skills
over formal education. Experience in handling real-world challenges often
outweight
Correct your spelling
outweighs
theoretical knowledge, especially when employers are looking for people who can "hit the ground running."
For example
, technique and trades are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
careers that
needs
Change the verb form
need
show examples
solid practical
skills
.
Moreover
,
this
way can save much time and energy.
To find
Fix the infinitive
Find
show examples
an expert, and
learn
Wrong verb form
learning
show examples
some specific abilities face-to-face can improve personal
skills
immediately. As a case in point, a painter who can find a master painter, and learn professional painting
skills
. To sum it up,
while
a
university
degree
is significant for certain careers, I believe
skills
and experience are becoming increasingly valuable, especially in industries that prioritize innovation and practical problem-solving. In today's job market, a combination of both is often ideal.
Therefore
, individuals should assess their career goals and choose the best
approach
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
the demands of the chosen field.
Submitted by ysh424 on

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language use
Work on improving sentence structure and grammar to ensure clarity and precision.
task achievement
Develop each point more comprehensively to enhance the argument.
content structure
The essay presents both sides of the argument fairly, showing an understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Clear introduction and conclusion help guide the reader through the argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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