Experts say older people were happier and healthier in the past because they did more excercise and spend more time with their family and friends whereas now many suffer loneliness and health problems.What are the causes o this and what are some solutions
Professional
claim that elderlies were in better Fix the agreement mistake
Professionals
health
condition and more cheerful in the previous time. However
, nowadays they are experiencing catastrophes like isolation and illness. Limitation
in Fix the agreement mistake
Limitations
the
communication with their family and insufficient physical activity contribute to these problems.
A few reasons can be given to justify the loneliness and lack of Correct article usage
apply
wellbeing
in the old population. First , their children mostly Correct your spelling
well-being
are struggled
with their personal Wrong verb form
struggle
life
and professions more than past. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
Due to
the
globalization and the competitive nature of it, individuals are not able to visit their parents as Correct article usage
apply
frequent
as Change the word
frequently
the
past. Change preposition
in the
Thus
, some elderlies might experience various stages of being alone. Another justification could possibly be the fact that the advancement in technology promote
Change the verb form
promotes
the
sedentary lifestyle for folk Correct article usage
a
in
different ages and there is no exception to the old population. Change preposition
of
For example
, increasing
number of Add an article
an increasing
the
old people using e-stores Correct article usage
apply
instead
of going out for shopping causes less physical activities
. Fix the agreement mistake
activity
Consequently
, they could be exposed to the risk of cardiovascular disease.
To tackle the issue of the
isolation, some groups could be established in order to give senior citizens an opportunity to meet and communicate with Correct article usage
apply
the
each Remove the article
apply
others
. Change to a singular noun
other
For instance
, those with same
interests could be in the same groups for performing collective activities Correct article usage
the same
such
as watching football games or taking part in ceremonies. As a result
, they can establish their own community in order to be in touch with their peers. Moreover
, to addressing
the issue of Wrong verb form
address
health
crises, devoting more time to exercise and regularly visiting doctor
could play a crucial role in the elder’s general wellbeing.
In conclusion, despite that Fix the agreement mistake
doctors
contemporary
lifestyle causes difficulties for Correct article usage
the contemporary
senior
population Add an article
the senior
such
as the
isolation and Correct article usage
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
health
issues, with
building Change preposition
by
the
communities for them to commute with themself with ease and more exercise Correct article usage
apply
along with
tracking their health
condition, their problem would be mitigated.Submitted by rezaei.rezvan94 on
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coherence cohesion
Focus on organizing your ideas logically into paragraphs. Each paragraph should have a clear central idea.
task achievement
Clarify and expand upon your arguments with more specific examples. Try to provide more detail in your examples to better illustrate your points.
coherence cohesion
The essay provides an introduction and a conclusion, which ensures a complete structure.
task achievement
The main points about the causes of loneliness and health issues in the elderly are clearly addressed.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...
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