In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this massage?
In some cultures, many times
children
are told that they can achieve anything if they try very hard. The advantages of this
Correct determiner usage
these
mesages
are Correct your spelling
messages
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
makes
Correct subject-verb agreement
make
children
hardworking and increases
their focus. The drawbacks are Correct subject-verb agreement
increase
children
become daydreamer
, and it affects their Fix the agreement mistake
daydreamers
confidence
.
If children
are told that anything can be achieved by trying hard, they will become hardworking. They will be encouraged to attain anything through their constant hard work
and dedication. Moreover
, trying to achieve any
success through hard Correct quantifier usage
apply
work
allows children
to increase their focus. They become more focused to achieve
something and maintain that until they reach their goals. Change preposition
on achieving
For instance
, in Bangladesh, children
are told that if they can achieve high scores in their exams by their hard work
, they will get rewards. This
helps them to keep focused until they achieve their goals.
However
, one of the drawbacks of teaching children
anything can be achieved through hard work
is children
become daydreamers. They cannot think practically and cannot set smart goals to achieve. Furthermore
, children
lose their confidence
if they are given the message that anything can be achieved by hard work
. When through hard work
they cannot achieve that, it affects their confidence
, and in the future
they do not want to encounter challenges. Add a comma
future,
For instance
, children
in India, once
told that they Add a missing verb
were once
can
achieve anything if they Wrong verb form
could
remain
focused. Wrong verb form
remained
Children
believed that but could not achieve that anticipated goal ultimately. That severely affects the confidence
of children
.
In conclusion, if children
are told that they can achieve anything through hard work
, it makes them hardworking and increases their focus. However
, it affects their confidence
and makes them daydreamers.Submitted by rahman_rehana on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to add specific transitions or linking words between paragraphs and ideas, such as 'On the other hand' or 'Therefore', to enhance the flow of arguments.
task achievement
Avoid repeating the same sentence structure or words, and try to vary your expressions for a more sophisticated writing style.
task achievement
The essay clearly outlines both advantages and disadvantages, showing a well-rounded consideration of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Clear introduction and conclusion, helping the reader to understand the main points and the overall argument.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?