Some countries have introduced laws to limit working hours for employees. Why are these laws introduced? Do you think they are a positive or negative development?
Recently, an increasing number of countries have decided to introduce
laws
to limit working hours
for those employees
. This
decision can be illustrated by many reasons, such
as the balance between work
and life, as well as
the health and productivity of employees
. Though that issue has both
advantages and drawbacks, it is clear that
the advantages outweigh disadvantages
.
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
Basiclly
, the primary purpose of those Correct your spelling
Basically
laws
is to make it easier to balance lifes
and jobs. Excessive working Correct your spelling
life
lives
hours
will reduce work
efficiency and diminish the power to push individuals to work
hard for the
wages. Correct article usage
apply
For instance
, research has came
up with Change the verb form
come
an
idea that Correct article usage
the
employees
whose working hours
are shorter usually can be more productive and creative during their working time, with a higher level of positive energy. Hence
, such
a policy can significantly benefit both
entrepreneurs and employees
by enhancing output, job saticfaction
and the activeness of working.
What's more, limiting working Correct your spelling
satisfaction
hours
can also
lower the percentage of health problems happening. Long working hours
will lead to both
physical and mental diseases. For example
, nations like South Korea, which requires a really long working
Correct the article-noun agreement
really long working hours
a really long working hour
hours
, offer people
with a stressful daily life and higher
possibility of the problem in waist, heart and headCorrect article usage
a higher
happened
. With a lower standard of healthy life, most of those Verb problem
apply
people
will suffer from more than just diseases. If South Korea can shorten the working hours
, individuals can have more purchasing power due to
the falling healthcare costs, thus
benefiting the
economic growth.
Critics may argue that it cannot be always Correct article usage
apply
benefitial
because of the lack of Correct your spelling
beneficial
employees
who can working
for a long time and the decreasing competitiveness. Change the verb form
work
be working
However
, this
phenomenon only will happen in short
run. In Add an article
the short
long
run, with a healthy cycle of finishing programs, Correct article usage
the long
both
of
the entrepreneurs and Change preposition
apply
employees
can have a better performance in their work
, along side
Correct your spelling
alongside
with
a creative, smart and active brain. Change preposition
apply
Furthermore
, after adapting those
circumstances, more jobs in companies will be provided, leading to less unemployment, Change preposition
to those
while
also
having
efforts Verb problem
making
in increasing
the output of those companies. Change preposition
to increase
As a result
, national markets can have the opportunity to widen the range of goods and industies
, to develop more scarce resources, and to higher Correct your spelling
industries
people
's real income which encourages them to buy more products in the market. So it is evidently
that the advantages outweigh the drawbacks.
In conclusion, though Change the word
evident
there're
still many critical thinking points that cannot agree, it is indeed a great choice to make Correct your spelling
there are
such
laws
. The introduction of laws
to limit working hours
is a significantly positive development in the government work
to provide more welfare to people
who are living in the country.Submitted by pitaleung8 on
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task achievement
Consider revising sections for conciseness. Some sentences are wordy and could be clearer with fewer words.
task achievement
Ensure that all main points are expanded adequately to give a comprehensive support for each argument.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive phrases and try to use a broader range of linking words to enhance fluency.
task achievement
The essay addresses the topic effectively and follows a clear structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion.
task achievement
Examples provided effectively illustrate the points made, particularly those relating to productivity and health issues.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical progression of ideas and uses paragraphs well to separate different arguments.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
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