In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impacts of ageing populations.

#world #life #expectancy #individuals #society #measures #impacts #populations

The advancement in technology,

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

improved the health of the

people

leading to longer

age

. Upcoming writing will discuss that

unemployement

Correct your spelling

unemployment

will

incline

Verb problem

increase

show examples

if older

people

would

Verb problem

show examples

not leave

work

Correct your spelling

the

show examples

force.

Whereas

, setting a

fix

Replace the word

fixed

show examples

retirement

age

and creating

new

Correct article usage

a new

show examples

job

can resolve the issue.

While

elder

people

will keep on doing their jobs,

then

new

job

vacancies will not be

avaliable

Correct your spelling

available

for the

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

youth.

This

will lead to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

unemployement

Correct your spelling

unemployment

among the

yongster

Correct your spelling

youngster

youngsters

because older

people

will not leave their

job

and there will be no hiring for the newcomers.

Hence

, youngsters will not get

job

opportunity

Fix the agreement mistake

opportunities

show examples

, as positions are not vacant by the current

job

holders.

This

problem can be resolved by fixing the

age

for retirement,

due to

this

when

people

will reach

there

Correct your spelling

their

show examples

60's

then

they can retire and new openings can be created for youth.

Moreover

, new

job

opportunities can be created to

cope-up

Correct your spelling

cope

show examples

with

unemployement

Correct your spelling

unemployment

Hence

, fixing the

reitrement

Correct your spelling

retirement

age

and creating new jobs can reduce the

unemployement

Correct your spelling

unemployment

According to

me, it is good that humans can

leave

Correct your spelling

live

show examples

longer but it is important to balance

Change preposition

apply

show examples

opportunities for youngsters and elderly

people

. It is important for

regime

Add an article

the regime

show examples

to take important initiatives like giving loans to startup

business

Fix the agreement mistake

businesses

show examples

so that more jobs are created.

Cinsidering

Correct your spelling

Considering

all the points above,

although

incline

Correct article usage

an incline

show examples

age

Add an article

the age

an age

show examples

of common

people

will lead to

leave

Change the verb form

leaving

show examples

unemployement

Correct your spelling

unemployment

but

Remove the conjunction

apply

show examples

this

can be resolved by setting

Change the article

show examples

age

for retirement and creating more

job

opportunities for the youth.

Submitted by simrantiwana1086 on Mon Oct 28 2024

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coherence cohesion

To improve coherence, aim to make the connections between ideas clearer and more seamless.

coherence cohesion

Enhance your logical structure by clearly outlining each point and ensuring that each paragraph flows logically from one to the next.

task achievement

Support your claims with specific examples or data to strengthen your argument.

task achievement

Make sure to fully address all parts of the question, considering both individual and societal impacts of an ageing population.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that frame the discussion well.

task achievement

The concern about unemployment due to an ageing workforce is well-identified as a potential problem.

task achievement

The essay suggests practical solutions, such as setting a retirement age and creating new jobs.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

246 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

life expectancy
ageing population
healthcare system
pension system
economic productivity
labor force
elderly care
caregiving services
social isolation
preventive healthcare
community support
workforce demographic
financial sustainability
healthcare innovation
family-friendly policies
remote work options
flexible working hours
mental well-being
population demographics
retirement age

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Hope you are doing well.

In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impacts of ageing populations.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that the experiences children have before they go to school will have the greatest effect on their future lives. Others argue that experiences gained when they are teenagers have a bigger influence. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school.

You have lost an item of value on a train. Write a letter to the railway company. In your letter Describe the item Explain where and when you left it Say what action you would like the company to take Write at least 150 words.