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Band 7

Some pople think that students should learn main subjects only. To what extent do you agree?

#pople #students #subjects
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It is often argued that learning main
subjects
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 is the most effective means of modern
education
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.
While
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 I concur that primary
subjects
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 are an essential part of the curriculum, I believe that it is not the only one, as other
subjects
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 like music and art are
also
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 equally important.
This
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 essay will discuss the importance of main
subjects
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,
as well as
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 the role of supplementary
subjects
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 in ensuring
overall
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 success in
education
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. One of the most obvious benefits of studying a main subject is that it ensures
students
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 gain deep knowledge in their field.
For instance
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,
students
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 who desire to be doctors are expected to have deep knowledge of biology and chemistry, allowing them to know human anatomy better. Thanks to
this
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 knowledge, doctors are able to detect illnesses easily, enabling them to find suitable recovery.
Thus
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, it is evident that studying fundamental themes like biology is essential in one's future career.
Nevertheless
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, it is important to recognize that the main
subjects
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 are insufficient to ensure
overall
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 academic success. Extra classes allow youngsters to develop certain soft skills, which are necessary to make a bright career.
For example
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, music allows the youth to improve stress management skills, letting
students
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 be more confident at work.
Moreover
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, studying art is a great way to boost creativity, which is key to developing problem-solving skills.
Hence
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,
students
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 cannot reach a successful career without supplementary
subjects
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.
To conclude
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,
while
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 primary
subjects
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 are undeniably a crucial aspect of
education
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, they must be complemented by supplementary
subjects
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. Focusing solely on special
subjects
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 like biology and chemistry may limit the effectiveness of
education
Use synonyms
Submitted by pandatvin3 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next by using linking words or phrases.
Task Achievement
Develop the examples provided further to offer a more detailed explanation.
Coherence and Cohesion
Clear introduction and logical structure that lays out both sides of the argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Effective conclusion that encapsulates the main points discussed.
Task Achievement
Main subjects and supplementary subjects are both discussed, addressing all parts of the prompt.
Task Achievement
Good use of examples to illustrate the importance of both main and supplementary subjects.
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