The diagram gives information about the process of making carbonated drinks. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram gives information about the process of making carbonated drinks. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The diagram illustrates the manufacturing process of carbonated drinks in a factory.
Overall
,
it is clear that
the manufacturing process of carbonated beverages consists of 5 stages beginning with cleaning water and ending with packaging. All the process is done automatically. The main equipment
are
Change the verb form
is
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a filter, a pump, an electric heater,and a mixing tank. To start with, raw water passes through the filter which consists of a water softener and chemicals and
then
it is heated by the electric heaters and
subsequently
passes through the cooling pipe into the evaporator to undergo carbonation.
After
this
, a carbonated liquid is poured through the pipe into the mixing tank which includes its colouring, scrap, and flavour. The next stage is filtering and filling the bottles and cans with the carbonated beverage and
subsequently
, these products are packaged into the boxes which is the final step for
further
transportation for supermarkets to sell.
Submitted by almirasartayeva on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "subsequently".
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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