Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as foood, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
A group of people thinks that, by giving
permissions
their Fix the agreement mistake
permission
child
's over decition
on Correct your spelling
over-decision
every day
affairs will Correct your spelling
everyday
consequently
cause their child
to become egocentric. Others consider that it is crucial for children
to make choices regarding issues that impact them.
Nowadays, many people think by their thought that if their children
are making decisions by
their own that will lead them to become selfish or they don't believe Change preposition
on
on
their Change preposition
in
child
's preferences. For example
, Nusrat wants to draw her imagination into her sketches, but her parents
don't let her draw anything into canvas, they think that their child
is maybe doing wrong
thing she should rather focus on her academic study. Her Add an article
the wrong
a wrong
parents
thinks
that doing Change the verb form
think
art work
is a wrong decision for herself and she might get a bad score in academic results.
Correct your spelling
artwork
However
, those people who understand that children
should decide by themselves due to
their cognitive skills grow as much as possible by understanding their difficulty to problem solving
Add a hyphen
problem-solving
solution
. Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
For instance
, student
of "Imperial Model School" found that not a single Fix the agreement mistake
students
student
was using the zebra crossing to go to the opposite side of the road, that
could lead students into a serious accident. So, he decided that he Correct pronoun usage
which
will
create a campaign about Wrong verb form
would
this
topic that
how important it is to follow the crossing carefully. Correct word choice
and
Thereafter
, the student
started the campaign and got impressive
amount of students Add an article
an impressive
as well as
parents
were interested about
Change preposition
in
this
topic as a result
students and parents
were
much more careful than before, they appreciated the Change the verb form
was
student
who made this
possible to follow the rules and regulation
.
In conclusion, guardians should focus on their Fix the agreement mistake
regulations
children
behaviour how they respond to a critical problem and how they solve it properly by their cognitive skills. We should not apply our thoughts Change noun form
children's
into
their brain, that won't Change preposition
to
going to
make Verb problem
apply
child's
smarter or better Change noun form
children
that
will make them suppressed. Correct pronoun usage
which
Therefore
, it is wise for children
to make their own choices by their skills of knowledge.Submitted by AL NURE FOYZUR REZA SUPRIO on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Ensure a balanced discussion of both views. Although both perspectives are addressed, they could be delved into more deeply to show a fuller understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow of ideas by clearly demarcating the different points and using linking words effectively.
coherence cohesion
Work on your grammar and sentence structure. While the main ideas are understandable, grammatical inconsistencies can distract the reader.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, setting a frame for the discussion.
task achievement
Examples are relevant and help illustrate the points being made, which strengthens the argument.
task achievement
The importance of cognitive development and independence for children is well highlighted, which supports the overall argument effectively.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.