Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The way we interact with each other can influence the outcome fundamentally, and
that is
why
people
argue about whether we should compete or cooperate with each
others
Change to a singular noun
other
show examples
.
Nonetheless
, in a complicated modern
world
,
people
should learn
both
behaviour styles to survive
this
VUCA
world
.
Competition
and
cooperation
both
have benefits and setbacks. First of all, we can hardly accomplish something great
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
our own nowadays since things are more complicated
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
ever.
However
, the resources which everyone value,
such
as money and promotion
oppotunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
, is
scarse
Correct your spelling
scarce
sparse
and limited. If we are forced to decide which one we should give the precious
resouce
Correct your spelling
resource
, in most
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
, the way to find out who is through
competition
.
That is
to say,
competition
and
cooperation
are
both
important to all of us. Despite learning how to
cooperation
Replace the word
cooperate
show examples
and
competiion
Correct your spelling
compete
together may sound
contradicted
Wrong verb form
contradicting
show examples
, the reality is that we live in a
VUCA
world
which makes one way of doing things impossible. "
VUCA
" means
votality
Correct your spelling
vitality
volatility
, uncertainty, complexity and ambiguity, and
this
term depicts the
world
we are living in perfectly. In
a
Change the article
an
show examples
environment
that is
always changing, we
also
need different ways to adjust the situation.
For example
, in the working context, we need to cooperate with our coworkers when we face customers for great experience; meanwhile, we will be competitors to our coworkers for a great opportunity to promote. In conclusion,
although
some think
people
should learn either
competition
or
cooperation
, in my view, we should learn
both
to survive
VUCA
Correct article usage
the VUCA
show examples
environment. Only
learn
Wrong verb form
learning
show examples
one of each will make
people
lose precious opportunities or achieve limited results, so we need
both
and use different styles in suitable
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
to achieve more.
Submitted by wendy86036581 on

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Task Achievement
Your essay presents a balanced discussion of both viewpoints and offers a clear opinion. Try to incorporate more specific examples to illustrate your points, making your argument stronger and more persuasive.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay is logically structured and ideas are generally clear. There are minor inaccuracies in grammar and vocabulary that do not significantly affect comprehension, but could be polished for greater accuracy.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction sets the stage effectively, and the conclusion succinctly wraps up your viewpoint. This creates a coherent flow from start to end.
Task Achievement
You've effectively identified the significance of both competition and cooperation within a modern context, particularly with regards to a VUCA world. This demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and its complexities.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovation
  • productivity
  • excel
  • outperform
  • advancements
  • academic standards
  • work ethic
  • stress
  • anxiety
  • unhealthy rivalries
  • harmonious
  • supportive
  • collaborative learning
  • social skills
  • communication skills
  • sense of community
  • collective goals
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