IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Write a letter to the manager of the delivery company. In your letter: •Give details of the delivery •Describe what was damaged •Say what you would like the manager to do

#manager #delivery #company #•give #•describe #•say
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Dear Sir, I am writing you to mention that recently I ordered the delivering to my home. I was supposed to get
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 new vacuum cleaner with
modern
Correct article usage
a modern
show examples
 system of dust collection.
Linking Words
Similarly
Add a comma
Similarly,
show examples
 I was supposed to get the big red sofa for two people. Later I
was getting
Wrong verb form
got
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 a call from
delivery
Add an article
the delivery
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 man and heard from him that he
broke
Wrong verb form
had broken
show examples
 the family heirloom – the vase rare engravings, left by my great-great-grandfather.
Besides
Linking Words
 I realized that the item exactly the vacuum cleaner was
also
Linking Words
 a bit damaged. I was confused
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
this
Linking Words
 information
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because didn’t expect
such
Linking Words
 unprofessionalism.
After
Linking Words
Linking Words
this
Add a comma
this,
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 I immediately begin writing you the message. I am very angry and expect big compensation. You owe me a new vacuum cleaner and money for moral damages. I look forward
hearing
Change preposition
to hearing
show examples
 from you the answer.
Correct the word
Yours
show examples
Your
Correct your spelling
Yours
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 sincerely Harry
Submitted by acaitaz on

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task achievement
Provide more specific details about the delivery date and order number to enhance the context.
task achievement
Elaborate on what kind of compensation you are expecting to make your message clearer to the manager.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph carries a single main idea. You can separate the description of the damaged items from your expectations.
coherence cohesion
Develop a more logical structure by clearly separating the introduction, problem description, and expected action steps.
coherence cohesion
The letter has clear opening and closing salutations, which provide a professional tone.
task achievement
The letter addresses all parts of the task by mentioning the details of the delivery, describing the damage and the expected actions.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.

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