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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Task 1 Task 2 The chart shows the percentage of women and men in one Asian country who passed when they took their driving test between 1980 and 2010.

#percentage #women #men #asian #country #test
The chart depicts the amount of
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 and
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 who can
passed
Change the verb form
pass
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driving
Correct article usage
the driving
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 test in a country
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
located in Asia from 1980 to 2010.
Overall
, the percentage of women who
does
Correct subject-verb agreement
do
show examples
 not fail the test always
exceed
Correct subject-verb agreement
exceeds
show examples
 men's percentage
in
Change preposition
apply
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every
year
. The data provided was calculated every 10
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
. As we can
seen
Change the verb form
see
show examples
 from the chart, in 1980, almost 50% of women
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 considered to be qualified
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the examination and slightly
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
around
Change preposition
to around
show examples
 50% in 1990.
Subsequently
, it increased immediately to the high point where it almost
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 70% in 2000 and after that, dropped back to 65% in 2010. If we are looking
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
male
Correct your spelling
make
show examples
 data that continuously increased every
year
, at the smallest point in 1980 which almost hit 30%
then
constanly
Correct your spelling
constantly
jump
Wrong verb form
jumped
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into
Change preposition
to
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 38% and 48% in 1990 and 2000 respectively and
remain
Wrong verb form
remained
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steadily
Change the word
steady
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at
Change preposition
in
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 the final
year
.
On
Change preposition
According to
show examples
 the data, men never pass more than 50% every
year
.
Submitted by pumasembiring on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.
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