The gap between rich and poor countries is expanding. How can it be resolved?

#gap #countries

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it is argued that the disparity between rich and poor

countries

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is expanding. Many poor

countries

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in Asian and African

region

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regions

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have to overcome

with

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apply

show examples

this

Linking Words

issue. I believe that there are three main problems associated with these issues, and

also

Linking Words

three remedies we can adopt. Perhaps the major problem we need to deal with is the amount of capital in rich

countries

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. The capital

become

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becomes

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the basic disparity between rich and poor

countries

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. It can be seen that the rich

countries

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could create

the

Correct article usage

apply

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sophisticated machines to support their people. The development of agricultural products

due to

Linking Words

these machines

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

increase

Correct subject-verb agreement

increases

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the income in rich

countries

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However

Linking Words

, poor

countries

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should take many foreign debts to obtain capital to boost their revenues. A

further

Linking Words

problem is the quality of human resources in poor

countries

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less than

rich

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in rich

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countries

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Moreover

Linking Words

, poor

countries

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have

crucial

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a crucial

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problem called corruption.

Hence

Linking Words

this

Change the determiner

these

show examples

three issues impact the distance between rich and poor

countries

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. Turning to possible solutions, probably the most effective the government of poor

countries

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earn capital

from

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apply

show examples

local

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locally

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by improving small,

medium

Correct word choice

and medium

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enterprises (SMEs). These SMEs develop the economics

Remove the comma

apply

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and enhance the income of poor nations.

In addition

Linking Words

, there are scholarships for citizens

continue

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to continue

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their higher

educations

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education

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. the high quality of human resources

impact

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impacts

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several aspects

such

Linking Words

as economics, research and development, and the availability of

employments

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employment

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Furthermore

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

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governments should take action by punishing perpetrators of corruption.

Therefore

Linking Words

, poor

countries

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need the government who implement these solutions to tackle the gap between rich and poor

countries

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. In conclusion, the key problems of disparity between rich and poor

countries

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can be addressed through

combination

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a combination

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of government awareness in gaining capital from locals

and

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apply

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building high-quality human resources and eradicating corruption.

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Sun Nov 03 2024

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task achievement

Expand on specific examples and details to support the main points, particularly regarding the solutions proposed.

coherence cohesion

Ensure paragraphs flow smoothly, using effective linking words and phrases to enhance coherence.

task achievement

The introduction clearly outlines the issues and the writer's intention to discuss problems and solutions.

coherence cohesion

The writer provides a structured response, addressing both problems and solutions in separate paragraphs.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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The gap between rich and poor countries is expanding. How can it be resolved?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Human cloning is today turning into one of the hottest issues in the world and while it has attracted many supporters, there are still people who disapprove of this modern science. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Many parents complain that computer games have no value to their children's studies. And, those online games have produced a lot of negative effects on their mental and physical development. What is your opinion on this?

Some people consider price as the most important thing to think about when buying a product (such as a cell phone) or service (medical treatment). Do you agree or disagree?

Grandparents play a big role in bringing up children. Do you think it is useful for grandparents? Discuss reasons with your opinion and give relevent examples.