It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Taking
risks
is an inseparable part of every individual’s life not only in their professions but
also
in their personal
lives
. Recently,
this
activity has sparked controversy regarding the advantages of it outweigh the disadvantages.
Hence
,
this
essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of
risks
and reveal my orientation towards
this
statement. In terms of the cons, taking
risks
would be accompanied by numerous effects on
risk takers'
Add a hyphen
risk-takers'
show examples
lives
in monetary form
as well as
their health. To put it differently, taking
risks
will result in hurting takers' bodies, particularly juveniles. The youth are far more likely to participate in dangerous activities which mostly will be done by an unskillful person;
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
consequently
, it leads to injuries and broken bodies which sometimes is hard to
make-up
Correct your spelling
make up
show examples
.
For example
, children who join in extreme sports, namely whitewater rafting and boxing, will regret
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their decisions and be hurt awfully in these games.
Conversely
, looking at its pros, it is beneficial for
people
's moods and alleviates their stress. In
another words
Replace the adjective
another word
other words
show examples
,
people
are usually struggling with various boring challenges in their
lives
.
Hence
,
risks
provide an opportunity to relieve adrenaline in bodies and enjoy their
lives
.
In addition
, it is psychologically proven that taking
risks
causes to increase
Verb problem
increases
show examples
life
Change noun form
life's
show examples
hope
due to
joy and excitement which are accompanied by satisfactory results of
risks
.
For example
, Elon Mask invested a huge amount of money
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
Bitcoin. An increase in the value of Bitcoin made him a prosperous person in the world. In conclusion,
taking
Correct your spelling
making
show examples
risky decisions
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
unavoidable and everyone undergoes it. Despite the fact that it can result in some irreversible issues, sometimes they can be beneficial for
people
. I believe that
people
should strike a balance
in
Change preposition
between
show examples
risks
and consider
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
consequent
Replace the word
consequences
show examples
as well.
Submitted by TUTOO on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

taskAchievement
Ensure that all points made in the essay are thoroughly supported with detailed examples or evidence to strengthen your argument and enhance clarity.
coherenceCohesion
Revisit some parts of the essay to make sure the ideas are presented in a more interconnected way. Although the flow is generally clear, refining transitions could improve coherence.
taskAchievement
Incorporate more specific examples and detailed evidence to support the main points more effectively, as this can help in illustrating your arguments more convincingly.
coherenceCohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively marking the scope and closure of the discussion.
taskAchievement
Your essay addresses the prompt comprehensively, recognizing both the advantages and disadvantages of taking risks.
coherenceCohesion
The ideas and arguments in the essay are presented logically, making it easy for the reader to follow the discussion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
What to do next:
Look at other essays: