IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The graphs show the changes in the UK industry steel between 1970 and 2000. (million tonnes vs thousand). Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Value changes in UK steel industry 1970-2000.

The graphs show the changes in the UK industry steel between 1970 and 2000. (million tonnes vs thousand). Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Value changes in UK steel industry 1970-2000.
#graphs #show #changes #uk #industry #steel #million #tonnes #thousand #information #features #comparisons #value
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The two graphs illustrate the changes in the
UK
Use synonyms
 steel
industry
Use synonyms
 between 1970 and 2000, showing fluctuations in demand,
production
Use synonyms
, and imports (measured in
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
)
as well as
Linking Words
 the
employment
Use synonyms
 status (measured in thousand workers).
Overall
Linking Words
, the
UK
Use synonyms
 steel
industry
Use synonyms
 experienced a significant decline in both
production
Use synonyms
 and
employment
Use synonyms
 over the period,
while
Linking Words
 demand and imports saw a gradual decrease and
then
Linking Words
leveled
Change the spelling
levelled
show examples
 off by the end of the period. The first graph shows that total
UK
Use synonyms
 demand started at around 200
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in 1970 and steadily declined over the next 30 years, stabilizing just below 100
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 by 2000.
UK
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
 followed a similar downward trend, decreasing from approximately 170
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in 1970 to about 50
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 by 2000. Meanwhile, imports remained low in the 1970s but began to rise in the 1980s, eventually converging with
UK
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
 by 2000. The second graph highlights a dramatic decrease in
employment
Use synonyms
 within the
UK
Use synonyms
 steel
industry
Use synonyms
. Starting at roughly 50,000 workers in 1970, the number of employees rapidly declined over the years, reaching around 10,000 by 2000.
This
Linking Words
 sharp drop in
employment
Use synonyms
 reflects the
overall
Linking Words
 contraction of the
industry
Use synonyms
 during
this
Linking Words
 period.
Submitted by elsenglish16992 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words uk, industry, production, million, tonnes, employment with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: