Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays all over the world, people share the same fashions, advertising, brands, eating habits, TV channels. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

#differences #countries #year #world #people #fashions #brands #habits #tv #channels #trend

These days,

homgenization

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homogenization

has

been

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

developed

tremonsously

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tremendously

, which is hard to recognise the differences between nations.

This

leads people

Add the particle

to follow

show examples

the same trends, brands, and even eating habits. There are some merits and demerits regarding

this

issue and it'll be discussed that the advantages of

this

issue override its negatives. On the

Correct your spelling

one

show examples

hand, there are some pros for having

common

Correct article usage

a common

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interest globally with regard to some life facets. First and foremost, these days thanks to the Internet, information is

spreaded

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spread

show examples

worldwide and people are more likely to be well-informed related to the latest news. Take

Correct article usage

the America

show examples

America

Replace the word

American

show examples

poll

for instance

, which

palys

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plays

a pivotal role not only in its country but

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

also

affects the whole people in

the

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apply

show examples

world.

In other words

, when individuals globally know what is

happenning

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happening

in the world they can make concrete decisions.

Furthermore

, Earth may turn

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out to

show examples

be a

sorts

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sort

show examples

peasful

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peaceful

and

tranquility

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tranquil

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place for living as long as a majority of

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the nation

show examples

nation

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nations

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united

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is united

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together, meaning that there may be less war

some day

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someday

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, owing to the unforming of life aspects.

On the other hand

, others may believe that global cultural homogenization

cause

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causes

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some

catastrphic

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catastrophic

problems. Disappearing some of the traditions is one of the apparent issues, which means the more global trends are

inroduced

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introduced

through

the

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apply

show examples

social media, the more cultures might

be vanished

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vanish

have vanished

show examples

. To illustrate, traditional clothes in Iran are not worn once the clear-cut technology

improved

Wrong verb form

improves

show examples

, meaning that

citizons

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citizens

this

country would rather wear trendy clothes as they believe they seem more stylish.

Moreover

, a whole host of nations, which are affected by

this

matter might seem dull since there

are

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show examples

not adequate diversity in cultures as they follow some united norms worldwide.

Consequently

, humans are more likely to feel bored after a

while

becuase

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because

the

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of the

show examples

monotonous lives that they lead.

To sum up

, the

advant

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advantage

of technology, which leads to some pros and cons,

individual's

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individuals'

show examples

lifestyles

has

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have

show examples

shifted towards

the

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apply

show examples

golobal

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global

trends, brands, and even their diets. These may bring about some

benefit

Fix the agreement mistake

benefits

show examples

for humans

such

as being fully aware of crucial news worldwide and the reduction of war,which means living in

tranquility

Change the spelling

tranquillity

show examples

Nonetheless

this

can have some

deterimental

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detrimental

side effects, including vanishing traditions of

counries

Correct your spelling

countries

and turning out to be tedious.

Submitted by sahar.moti1994 on Tue Nov 05 2024

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task achievement

Try to maintain a more consistent focus on the main question throughout your essay. Clearly state whether the advantages or disadvantages are more significant, and consistently support this viewpoint.

coherence cohesion

Enhance your logical structure by using clear topic sentences and linking words, like 'firstly', 'however', 'on the other hand'. Ensure each paragraph clearly supports your main argument.

task achievement

Provide more relevant specific examples to substantiate your points, such as specific events or data, to give your arguments greater weight.

task achievement

Your essay addresses the question prompt, providing both advantages and disadvantages.

coherence cohesion

You have included an introduction and conclusion, giving your essay a clear beginning and end.

task achievement

You attempted to use topic-specific vocabulary, which adds depth to your essay's development.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
40Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

374 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural globalization
Cultural exchange
Cross-cultural communication
Assimilation
Homogenization
Acculturation
Traditional customs
Local economies
Diversity
Inclusion

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Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays all over the world, people share the same fashions, advertising, brands, eating habits, TV channels. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Your opinion

Some people think that hosting an international sports event is good for the country, while some people think it is bad. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

: Some people say that traffic accidents are caused by the increasing number ò motorbikes. Other blame for man’s fault. Which point of view do you agree ?

Some people prefer to live in a house, while others feel that there are more advantages to living in an apartment. Are there more advantages than disadvantages of living in a house compared with living in an apartment?

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. others ‚however, believe that school is the palce to learn this. C Check the essay discuss both these views and give your opinion.