To achieve international sporting success, many countries build specialized facilities for the training of top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

These days,
the
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apply
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international
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
events
such
as
Olympics
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the Olympics
show examples
are really important for countries, so a number of countries invest in
the
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apply
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special equipment that
help
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helps
show examples
the
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apply
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professional sportsmen
incontrats
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in contrast
to improving
sport
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sports
show examples
facilities for their inhabitants. In my opinion,
this
is
Correct article usage
a positive
show examples
positive
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positively
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happening owing to the
fact
that
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
work
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
the top athletes become better, and obtain medals in essential global
competition
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competitions
show examples
. On the one hand, if the facilities that
sportsment
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sportsmen
sportsman
, who have a competition in international events, climb, they can
practices
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practice
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better than prior time; in
fact
, new gadgets help
the
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apply
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people to find their matters and solve
themon
Correct your spelling
them on
account of the
fact
that these new devices are made by new technology and scientists create them
besides
on the
argunomic
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ergonomic
agronomic
way;
as a result
,
the
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they
show examples
do not injure
athlets
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athletes
like old items.
On the other hand
, the
fact
that is
really crucial for not only citizens but
also
governments
is
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are
show examples
that they can
achive
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achieve
a lot of medals, which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
reapectively
Correct your spelling
respectively
gold, the special type, silver, and bronze, type in international events and get the lowest level owing to the
fact
that
these
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this
show examples
factor is the elements that both nation and
outhorities
Correct your spelling
authorities
to proud their nationality;
consequently
, for
this
successfully the sportsmen need new tools for improving their skills and play with various methods.
To sum up
,
the
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apply
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sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
facilities for the population
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
essential;
however
, in my opinion, the
enahncing
Correct your spelling
enhancing
of equipment that
aid
Change the verb form
aids
show examples
professional athletes to
gain
Verb problem
achieve
show examples
their
goal
Fix the agreement mistake
goals
show examples
and medals is more necessary.
Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on

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relevant specific examples
Try to use more specific examples to support your arguments, such as mentioning specific sports or countries that have benefited from specialized facilities.
supported main points
Ensure that your main points are fully developed and supported throughout the essay. Consider expanding on the benefits or drawbacks of specialized sports facilities for the general public versus top athletes.
clear comprehensive ideas
Focus on improving the clarity of your ideas. Some sentences are complex or have errors that may confuse the reader, so try simplifying these sentences or checking for grammar mistakes.
complete response
The essay provides a complete response to the task, addressing both sides of the issue and giving your opinion.
introduction conclusion present
Both an introduction and a conclusion are present, effectively opening and closing the essay.
logical structure
There is a clear logical structure to the essay, with distinct paragraphs discussing different aspects of the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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