IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

The world today is a safer place than it was a hundred years ago, and government should stop spending large amount of money on their armed forces . To what extent do you agree or disagree?

One of the widely discussed issues nowadays should
university
Check wording
apply
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focus on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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giving access to
students
Use synonyms
 or
provide
Wrong verb form
providing
show examples
 them knowledge and skills
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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needed in the workplace
?
Change the punctuation
.
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 I tend to think that today
university
Fix the agreement mistake
universities
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 in the first two years
afford to
Verb problem
provide
show examples
students
Use synonyms
basic
Change preposition
with basic
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knowledges
Fix the agreement mistake
knowledge
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 in my country,
then
Linking Words
on
Change preposition
in
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 the third and fourth
courses
Check wording
years
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students
Use synonyms
give
Verb problem
spend
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 many
times
Check wording
lot
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for
Change preposition
of
show examples
Use synonyms
practice
Check wording
time practising
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 and
prepare
Wrong verb form
preparing
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 for their future work, and in summer weekends they
undergoing
Wrong verb form
undergo
show examples
 an internship in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
many different companies. On the one hand, in my opinion that
practice
Use synonyms
 completely enough for working on the easier places for beginning,
,
Change the punctuation
apply
show examples
then
Linking Words
, they will gain
practice
Use synonyms
 yet, and
becomes
Correct subject-verb agreement
become
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entirelly
Correct your spelling
entirely
 quality workers.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, if
students
Use synonyms
not
Verb problem
are not
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 ready for working after university, we have many companies where
unexperienced
Use the right word
inexperienced
show examples
 people can go through
internship
Correct article usage
an internship
show examples
. In conclusion, so many universities in the world
gives
Correct subject-verb agreement
give
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 enough
practice
Use synonyms
 for
students
Use synonyms
, even after that we have people
whose
Use the right word
who are
show examples
 not ready for working, because they did not use all
possibilities
Correct article usage
the possibilities
show examples
 which gives them universities
.
Verb problem
offer.
show examples

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction. Always restate it in the conclusion as well.
coherence and cohesion
Work on the flow of your ideas. Use linking words to connect sentences and paragraphs better.
task achievement
Develop your points with more examples or details to support your ideas.
task achievement
You presented a relevant topic and gave your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological advancements
  • cybersecurity
  • surveillance
  • defense mechanisms
  • diplomatic relations
  • global organizations
  • United Nations (UN)
  • NATO
  • peace treaties
  • socioeconomic development
  • military expenditure
  • humanitarian outcomes
  • non-violent conflict resolution
  • historical perspective
  • counter-terrorism
  • internal security
  • traditional military expenditure
  • ethical argument
  • allocate funds
  • infrastructure
What to do next:
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