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Writing Samples
Band 7

In many countries, some employers reject job applicants because of their age. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?"

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Age
Use synonyms
 has become an increasingly important factor in recruitment in many countries, with some employers refusing to hire candidates solely because they are considered either too old or too young. In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
 is a highly negative development, as it not only deprives businesses of valuable talent but
also
Linking Words
 gives rise to unfair treatment in society. One major drawback of
age
Use synonyms
-based discrimination is that companies may overlook highly competent individuals. Older workers,
for example
Linking Words
, often possess extensive professional expertise, practical knowledge and well-developed interpersonal skills that have been accumulated over decades. Excluding
such
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 candidates merely because of their
age
Use synonyms
 means that businesses lose access to a wealth of experience that could enhance productivity and mentor younger employees.
Likewise
Linking Words
, young applicants may bring fresh perspectives, creativity and technological proficiency, all of which are increasingly valuable in today's rapidly changing workplace.
Therefore
Linking Words
, judging candidates by
age
Use synonyms
 rather than merit can ultimately hinder organisational success. Another reason why
this
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 trend should be regarded negatively is that it undermines the principle of equality and can have severe social consequences. Employment opportunities should be determined by qualifications, competence and work ethic rather than demographic characteristics. When individuals are denied jobs because of their
age
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, they may experience financial difficulties, diminished self-esteem and a sense of social exclusion.
Moreover
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, widespread
age
Use synonyms
 discrimination can exacerbate unemployment and place additional pressure on governments to provide welfare support.
Such
Linking Words
 outcomes are detrimental not only to affected individuals but
also
Linking Words
 to society as a whole. Admittedly, some employers argue that younger workers are more adaptable and technologically literate,
whereas
Linking Words
 older employees may struggle to cope with innovation.
However
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,
this
Linking Words
 assumption is overly simplistic, since a person's capabilities vary considerably and cannot be accurately predicted on the basis of
age
Use synonyms
 alone. Appropriate training and lifelong learning can enable employees of all
age
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 groups to remain productive and competitive. In conclusion, rejecting applicants because of their
age
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 is undoubtedly a negative development. It prevents organisations from benefiting from diverse talents and experiences
while
Linking Words
 simultaneously promoting inequality and social injustice. Recruitment decisions should be based on ability and suitability rather than
age
Use synonyms
-related stereotypes.

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task response
For task response, your answer is clear and you give your opinion all the way through. To be even stronger, add one short real example to support your ideas.
task response
For task response, your main ideas are good, but some parts are general. Try to explain one point a little more deeply.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay is easy to follow and each paragraph has a clear job. Keep this clear paragraph plan.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your linking words are used well, but do not use too many formal links in every paragraph. Sometimes simpler links are enough.
task response
For task response, you fully answer the question and your position is very clear from start to end.
task response
For task response, your ideas are relevant and well focused on age and hiring.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a strong beginning, body, and ending.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, each main paragraph stays on one main idea, so the essay is smooth to read.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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