Too much emphasis is put on going to university for academic studies. We should encourage people to have vocational education since there are not enough qualified businessmen, electricians and plumbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In
modern
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the modern
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era, education is the key to
sucess
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success
. As we know
that
Correct determiner usage
the
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importance
for
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of
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student
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students
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to go university is highly in demand.
While
,
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apply
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there are few individuals
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who reckons
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reckons
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reckon
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that people should motivate their children
in opting
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to opt
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vocational
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for vocational
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education as
this
is the need of
the
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apply
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society.
However
, I agree with both
the
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apply
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viewpoints and discuss
in
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them in
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more
details
Fix the agreement mistake
detail
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in the upcoming paragraphs.
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coherence cohesion
Make sure to introduce clear and logical structure to your essay. Clarify your main points and support them with examples.
task achievement
Try to expand on each viewpoint with specific examples and explanations. This will help in presenting a complete response to the essay question.
coherence cohesion
Provide a more comprehensive introduction and conclusion to strengthen the coherence and cohesion of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The introduction gives a clear understanding of the topic and your stance on it.
task achievement
The essay touches upon important societal needs, which enriches the discussion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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