IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people prefer to live in a small town. Others prefer to live in a big city. Which place would you prefer to live in? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

#people #town #city #place #support
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In
this
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 modern era, it's always debatable between urban and rural life, now that has become controversial in recent times. Some folks concur that living in a
city
Use synonyms
 is the best place rather than
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
town
Use synonyms
while
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 others reject
this
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 notion. In my opinion, the latter proposition
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 more suitable for me
due to
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 the plethora of reasons. I will elaborate in more detail in the forthcoming paragraph.
To begin
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 with, cities always have better infrastructure in terms of jobs, education, medical facilities etc.
For instance
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, many adults come to
Use synonyms
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
 from the rural areas for a better job.
Furthermore
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,
people
Use synonyms
 when they have free time, can be involved in extracurricular activities
such
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 as yoga, swimming and so on.
According to
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 a recent survey conducted by BBC Channels, 76% of
people
Use synonyms
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
prefer to live in the
city
Use synonyms
.
In addition
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, there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 a lot of opportunities , especially in the job. To epitomise the current statement, we can say that
people
Use synonyms
 who have enough knowledge and skills can get a decent job with a better salary package than
small
Change preposition
in small
show examples
 towns.
Hence
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, all the merits stand in good stead.
On the other hand
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, in a small
town
Use synonyms
, there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 a lot of scenic views,
no
Correct word choice
and no
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 traffic congestion.
However
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, in terms of medical emergencies,
people
Use synonyms
 need to travel to the
city
Use synonyms
 to get treatment. It has
very
Correct article usage
a very
show examples
 low crime rate,
less
Correct word choice
and less
show examples
 noise pollution.
People
Use synonyms
 feel
more close
Replace the words
closer
show examples
 to the
resisdent
Correct your spelling
resident
president
, groceries, rent and other essentials are more affordable
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to cities.
People
Use synonyms
 who love nature, can feel peace and calm by living in the small
town
Use synonyms
.
Hence
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, it's apparent why many
people
Use synonyms
 want to live in the small
town
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 based on
individuals
Change noun form
individuals'
individual's
show examples
 choice
where
Change preposition
of where
show examples
 they want
prefer
Verb problem
apply
show examples
to live.
However
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, many of
oldest
Correct article usage
the oldest
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 prefer to live in the same
town
Use synonyms
. Youngest prefer to live in
Use synonyms
city
Add an article
the city
a city
show examples
 for
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 better life.
Submitted by dhivyaravi0396 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Develop clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to enhance coherence and provide a roadmap for the reader.
Task Achievement
Include more specific examples or statistics to support claims, such as success stories or specific city amenities.
Coherence and Cohesion
Be more consistent in linking ideas logically across and within paragraphs to improve overall flow.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively set up and summarize your points, respectively.
Task Achievement
The essay presents a comprehensive response to the prompt, considering both sides of the argument.
Task Achievement
You successfully use comparative language to discuss advantages of both urban and rural living, like 'better infrastructure' and 'scenic views'.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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