Many employees may work at home with the modern technology. Some people claim that it can benefit only the workers, not the employers. Do you agree or disagree?

Work
Wrong verb form
Working
show examples
from
home
has become a common practice in
this
modern era.
While
it is often said that it can only provide benefits for the
employees
, it seems to me that flexible working might
give
Verb problem
have
show examples
positive effects not only for the
employees
but
also
for the
company
. Working from anywhere, whether from
home
, a café, or a coworking space, provides benefits for
employees
in saving money and time. The
employees
can get their job done faster so they still have extra time to do anything else
such
as taking care of their family and even taking multiple jobs.
Moreover
,
due to
not needing to
work
in the
office
, they do not have to deal with traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
or overcrowded public transport in rush hour.
Besides
that, they
also
do not need to buy appropriate
office
attire as they can wear any casual clothes.
On the other hand
, allowing their employee to
work
outside the
office
might save a
company
a large amount of budget and enhance the
company
's productivity. The
company
can cut down its cost
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
maintaining an
office
and minimize the budget
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
electricity,
office
rent, and
office
equipment.
Additionally
, by having their employee
work
from
home
, a
company
can easily track their workers' job progress resulting in fast-paced projects.
Furthermore
, by offering
work
home
home
facilities they can employ more professionals globally with lower salaries. To
sums
Correct subject-verb agreement
sum
show examples
up, working from
home
has many advantages for both the employee and employers as it could raise productivity and money-saving.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples or statistics to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Try to use more varied sentence structures to enhance readability.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced argument for both employees and employers benefiting from remote work.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly states the writer's perspective and sets up the essay nicely.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion is effective, summarizing the main points well.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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