People who decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it are more likely to have a satisfying working life than those who change jobs frequently.To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

Nowadays
jobs
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job
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turnover frequency is escalating, leading to
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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distracted employment conditions,
thus
, Experts believe that deciding on a specified career
path
is more beneficial than bouncing over from one job to another, I absolutely agree with
this
statement because it will lead to job progression,
in addition
to financial stability. First and foremost, decisive youngsters
whom
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
select a specific work
path
and follow a progression strategy in the same field are most likely to succeed and prosper in their major,
besides
to
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apply
show examples
achieving ultimate growth goals as they mount the hierarchy progressively, never the less become more efficient , gain better experience and achieve sustainable performance.
For
example
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example,
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I studied event management, and I was decisive about my career
path
. I worked in the same field for
couple
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a couple
show examples
of years till I reached my optimum goal of establishing my own private business in event management as well ,
this
happened after all the experience I assembled
from
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in
show examples
the same field.
This
will
also
result in one’s financial stability, identifying an employment plan secures income,
furthermore
, it avoids regression that may arise
due to
the move from one company to another.
Also
, financial constancy provides peace of mind by reducing stress related to money.
For example
, during COVID time the people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
decided to leave their jobs and work in
another companies
Replace the adjective
another company
other companies
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,
where
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were
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the first ones to be laid off because most of the companies
where
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were
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loyal to their old
employee
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employees
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rather than the ones who recently joined.
Inconclusion
Correct your spelling
In conclusion
show examples
, targeting a certain career
path
will result in more income stability , massive experience and proper
profession
Replace the word
professional
show examples
growth.
Submitted by Mido  on

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task achievement
Aim to make your introduction clearer by explicitly stating whether you agree, disagree, or partially agree with the statement.
coherence cohesion
Try to ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea or theme to maintain a logical structure.
task achievement
Consider using a wider range of vocabulary and complex sentence structures to enhance your essay's clarity and sophistication.
task achievement
You presented relevant examples from your own experience, which enhanced your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, contributing to the coherence and cohesion of the text.
task achievement
The essay effectively uses real-life examples that are relevant and specific to support the main points.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • career path
  • job satisfaction
  • professional goals
  • climb the career ladder
  • develop expertise
  • long-term commitment
  • financial security
  • varied experiences
  • prevent monotony
  • job security
  • career progression
  • personal preferences
  • industry dynamics
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