Write about the following topic: In many parts of the world today there is a profitable market for products which lighten or whiten people’s skin. Outline the reasons for using such products and discuss what effect they have in terms of health on society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
#topic #parts #world #market #products #whiten #people’s #skin #outline #effect #terms #health #society
In
differrent
parts of the world at Correct your spelling
different
present
there is so much demand for Add a comma
present,
skin
brightning
Correct your spelling
brightening
products
and those have juse
demand. Correct your spelling
just
this
discuss
Change the verb form
discusses
about
those Remove the preposition
apply
products
and causes the health
issues.
Change preposition
of health
Firstly
many people
want to be fair, becuase
they Correct your spelling
because
asume
that, Correct your spelling
assume
fair
Correct word choice
skinned
skin
people
looks
good and attractive, higher social status, Change the verb form
look
this
belife
Correct your spelling
belief
rooted
Add a missing verb
is rooted
from
historical Change preposition
in
influnce
. example: if any job for Correct your spelling
influence
influences
front
desk will prefer to hair fair and slim who looks good.
Another factor Add an article
the front
increased
demand for Correct pronoun usage
that increased
this
product many
of the dark Add a missing verb
is many
skin
people
tend to use this
Change the determiner
this product
these products
products
to get fairness becuase
, in some countries Correct your spelling
because
believed
lighter Wrong verb form
believe
skin
Replace the word
skinned
people
lead better job prospect
and Fix the agreement mistake
prospects
marrige
opportunities, which will motivate Correct your spelling
marriage
Add an article
the individual
an individual
individual
to use Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
skin
whitening products
despite potential health risk, in some skin
whitening products
contains some negative chemicals which have advers
effect cause itching and irritation Correct your spelling
adverse
people
should be cautious about those things.
Example
:- In India Bride like to marry a fair groom.
In Change preposition
For example
conclusion
lighter Add a comma
conclusion,
skin
have
Change the verb form
has
negative
impact on dark Add an article
a negative
skin
tone it leads to social division steriotypes
. Correct your spelling
stereotypes
This
can contribute to discrimination and social inequality.Submitted by karuna.mk220 on
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introduction conclusion present
Consider expanding your introduction and conclusion to provide a clearer framework for your essay. This can help guide the reader through your ideas more effectively and strengthen your essay's overall structure.
logical structure
Organize your ideas more logically, ensuring each paragraph has a clear main point and flows smoothly into the next. This will improve the cohesion of your essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
Develop your ideas more comprehensively, possibly by including statistics, expert opinions, or detailed examples to reinforce your arguments.
task response
Check for minor grammatical and spelling errors, as addressing these can gently enhance your essay's readability.
task achievement
The essay addresses a significant aspect of societal behavior by acknowledging the influence of historical and social factors on people's desire for skin lightening.
relevant specific examples
You include culturally relevant examples, which add authenticity and depth to your discussion, such as the example pertaining to marriage preferences in India.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.