IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Task 2 Although more and more people read news on the internet, newspapers will remain the most important source of news. Do you agree or disagree .

#people #news #internet #newspapers #source
Some people believe that
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 will be the most beneficial way to learn about the news,
however
, I believe that the
newspapers
also
 are the best way to read something equally
with
Change preposition
to
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 the
internet
. On the one
hand
Add a comma
hand,
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 there are a lot of
benefits
 to
learn
Wrong verb form
learning
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by
Change preposition
from
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newspapers
. The main reason is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 you completely understand the concept of
topic
Add an article
a topic
the topic
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 when you are reading
newspapers
 or articles.
Additionally
Add a comma
,
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if you more read books, the more your
interesting
Replace the word
interest
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 increases little by little day by day.
These factor
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This factor
These factors
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,
as a result
, lead to more information to improve your
intelligent
Replace the word
intelligence
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. In turn , nowadays so many people become one-dimensional
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
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because of not interested in reading
news
Correct article usage
the news
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. On the other hand
internet
 sources are likely to become as popular as
newspapers
 for a variety of reasons.
Firstly
, individuals can find information without difficulties compared to the journals.
Furthermore
 these days there are a lot of
benefits
 to
use
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using
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 the
internet
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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students. For example, candidates may
be unite
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be united
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 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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online courses which
is improve
Change the verb form
improve
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 their intelligence level . Students
maybe
Correct your spelling
may
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 share their well-structured opinions with each other by online chats. Another key
benefits
Change the noun form
benefit
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
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benefits
 compared to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
newspapers
 are
ebility
Correct your spelling
ability
 to follow their teachers via
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 programs
such
 as Instagram, Twitter or YouTube. A final point is that the source of news is less damaging to the environment. In conclusion, the source of
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 become more popular step-by-step,
however
, I believe that
newspapers
 are still equally important.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and avoid sentences that may distract from it.
task achievement
Develop a more focused thesis statement that clearly states your position and guides the argument throughout the essay.
task achievement
Support your points with specific and relevant examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
You successfully included both an introduction and a conclusion, which frame your essay well.
task achievement
The essay addresses both sides of the argument, showing an understanding of the task requirements.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • reliable
  • credible
  • focused
  • immersive
  • tangibility
  • tradition
  • access
  • digital devices
  • demographics
  • older generation
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