IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#line #show #information #crime #uk #year #features #comparisons
The line graph depicts the data on the relation between age and illegal
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
while
 the pie chart shows the types of
crime
took
Correct pronoun usage
that took
show examples
 place in the UK throughout the
last
year
.
However
,
according to
 the line chart, 12
years
 was the time in life when
people
 got involved with criminal acts. During
last
year
, around 50000 boys were responsible for different types of vulgar activities which increased dramatically in the age group of 16 and reached the peak at the age group of 20 with a
number
 of 0.8 million
people
.
Then
, a drastic fall was seen and the
number
 came down to 200000 in the 28
years
 old category. After that, the
number
 decreased gradually and
finally
 came to the lowest
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the 60
years
 group with a
number
 shy of 100000
people
 in the
last
year
.
On the other hand
, 46% of the total criminal activities in the UK were related to different types of violation which was, in fact, the highest, followed by property
crime
, dealing with drugs, and
crime
 related to public order with the numbers of 23%, 22% and 9% respectively.
Overall
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
young
people
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
20
years
 old were at the top of the pyramid in case of
occuring
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a
crime
whereas
 violation was the most recurring
crime
 in the UK during the
last
year
.
Submitted by jisan.path1506605 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words crime, year, years, people, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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