IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many people feel that media coverage has becoming increasingly biased today. Why is this? What can be done to fix this problem?

#people #media #coverage
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In the contemporary world, it has been debates that
media
 should be transparent and
brodcast
Correct your spelling
broadcast
 true incidents and
stores
Correct your spelling
stories
show examples
.
Whereas
, certain
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
 of people are of the opinion that modern
media
 is biased. Personally, there are
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 reasons for
this
 trend like
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
political pressure and greed for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money.
However
, in
this
 essay, I shall discuss both causes and
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
show examples
 for
this
 problem. On the one hand, it is evident that
media
 is controlled by the government. On the
televesion
Correct your spelling
television
 reporters are afraid to share
real
Add a hyphen
real-life
show examples
life
 incidents.
Additionally
, if any
media
 channel courage to share the hard reality of
crime
Correct article usage
the crime
show examples
 world, they could
loss
Replace the word
lose
show examples
 their
life
.
For example
,
recent
Add an article
the recent
show examples
 crime scene
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the
India
Replace the word
Indian
show examples
 medical college in Kolkata, Doctor was
bruttely
Correct your spelling
brutally
 raped and murdered in
a
Change the article
an
show examples
opperating
Correct your spelling
operating
 room of the hospital. All reporters were threatened to
loss
Replace the word
lose
show examples
 their licenses and
life
Replace the word
lives
show examples
 if they
try
Wrong verb form
tried
show examples
 to public
true
Correct article usage
the true
show examples
 story of heinous
act
Fix the agreement mistake
acts
show examples
.
Moreover
, the CBI
report
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 proved that local
officals
Correct your spelling
officials
 and
media
 networks have paid millions of dollars to hide
this
 story from
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
.
On the other hand
, there are
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 ways by which people can
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
trust
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
news networks again.
Firstly
, the government officials can present a bill in the
parleament
Correct your spelling
parliament
 to protect
rights
Correct article usage
the rights
show examples
 of
journalist
Fix the agreement mistake
journalists
show examples
.
Moreover
, in
this
 bill safety of
newsman
Fix the agreement mistake
newsmen
show examples
 should be priorities.
Secondly
, if someone tries to bribe law protectors or broadcaster to keep their crime a secret, officials should feel safe to
report
 all
incident
Fix the agreement mistake
incidents
show examples
 to their higher authorities.
For example
, if
journalist
Fix the agreement mistake
journalists
show examples
 have
couvered
Correct your spelling
covered
 a story of the rape victim, they should not sell themselves for money
instead
 they can
report
official
Add an article
an official
the official
show examples
 complaint.
To conclude
, it is true that many
columnist
Change to a plural noun
columnists
show examples
 broadcast one side of the
report
 because they have pressure from higher officials or
life
 threats.
Although
, solutions for
this
 issue could be special bill need to be approved in the
parleament
Correct your spelling
parliament
 to protect
safety
Add an article
the safety
show examples
 of journalist.
Submitted by lovjotsandhu1 on

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task achievement
To enhance task achievement, ensure a clearer organization of ideas and better development of each point. Consider elaborating on each cause and solution with more depth and providing additional specific examples.
coherence and cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on using linking words more effectively. This will help connect your ideas smoothly and ensure that each paragraph flows logically into the next.
task achievement
The essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic by identifying some root causes of media bias, such as political pressure and financial incentives.
coherence and cohesion
The structure of the essay is logical, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion present.
task achievement
The essay includes specific examples, such as the incident in the Kolkata medical college, which adds relevance and specificity to the arguments.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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