Some people believe the media should be allowed to publish private information about people, while others are against it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Media
is a must
iportant
Correct your spelling
important
for
publish
Change the verb form
publishing
show examples
all about
newses
Change the wording
news
pieces of news
items of news
show examples
seemly. every person
use
Change the verb form
uses
show examples
this
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
know many
newses
Change the wording
pieces of news
items of news
show examples
and information. some people hope the
media
allowed
Wrong verb form
allow
show examples
many news
publish
Wrong verb form
published
show examples
about
privete infoemation
Correct your spelling
private information
. other group
are
Verb problem
do
show examples
not accept
this
argument. I will explain two views opinion
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
paragraph.
Firstly
,
media
Correct article usage
the media
show examples
is publishing
Wrong verb form
publishes
show examples
all around
newses
about all the
matter
Fix the agreement mistake
matters
show examples
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
many
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
it will be
usfull
Correct your spelling
useful
for everyone because it is
knowladefull
Correct your spelling
knowledgeable
. some
time
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
media
will
bunlish
Correct your spelling
bullish
publish
some
privet
information it will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
that
persion
Correct your spelling
person
and
socitey
Correct your spelling
society
.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
many years ago
wikkilish
Correct your spelling
ticklish
published around the world
farmous
Correct your spelling
famous
persion
Correct your spelling
person
details. it was
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
problem and talk everyone
aout
Correct your spelling
about
the
matter
. it has many
privet
matter
about some
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
. if it
publish
Change the verb form
publishes
show examples
sometime
whom
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
can take some
immediat
Correct your spelling
immediate
action
sometime
Correct your spelling
sometimes
show examples
it
wil
Correct your spelling
will
be
suiside
Correct your spelling
suicide
.
Moreover
,
other group
Change the wording
another group
other groups
show examples
of people
not
Add a missing verb
do not
show examples
accept
this
opinion. they
are not accept
Change the verb form
do not accept
show examples
this
point social
media
not
Add a missing verb
does not
show examples
publish
privet
information. I
thing
Correct your spelling
think
show examples
they are not accept
this
point. because they
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
consider
this
is
also
only news do not care about others and do not see
as
Correct pronoun usage
it as
show examples
a
Remove the article
privet news
a piece of privet news
show examples
privet
news. It will be
help
Replace the word
helpful
show examples
to others.
for
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
if someone did drug
usege
Correct your spelling
usage
use
puplic
Correct your spelling
public
can not
known
Change the verb form
know
be known
show examples
about the
matter
recently
publish
Wrong verb form
published
show examples
about it who and
socity
Correct your spelling
society
will be alete
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
it
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
In
conclution
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, all
newses
Correct your spelling
news is
show examples
publish
Wrong verb form
published
show examples
from social
media
however
it will publish
privet
and
usfull informations
Correct your spelling
useful information
.when it
publish
Correct subject-verb agreement
publishes
show examples
any
informatioms
Correct your spelling
information
that has
nagetive
Correct your spelling
negative
and positive development. as
asocial
Correct your spelling
social
show examples
media
user
Fix the agreement mistake
users
show examples
if we need
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
we can get
otherwise
we will
avoites
Correct your spelling
avoid
them
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
.
Submitted by nrilwan373 on

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Language
Work on improving sentence structure and grammar. This will help in making your ideas clearer and easier to understand.
Language
Consider refining your vocabulary. Using precise terms can significantly enhance the quality of your argumentation.
Structure
Structure your essay more clearly. Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to improve coherence and cohesion.
Content
Provide more relevant and detailed examples to support your ideas. This will aid in developing a stronger task response.
Structure
Your introduction and conclusion should clearly outline and summarize the main points of your essay. This will enhance your logical structure.
Content
Your essay attempts to address both sides of the debate on media and privacy, which is a good approach.
Structure
You have included an introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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