IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Question：more students study abroad to learn new things today do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages？ is it positive or negative？ agree or disagree to what extent do you agree or disagree？

#question：more #students #study #disadvantages？ #negative？ #disagree？
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In
this
 era of state of art where
people
 live in a global village owing to the advancement of technology and
numerous
Change the article
a numerous
the numerous
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number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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students
 are going to overseas for
persing
Correct your spelling
pursuing
 their higher education. I agree that
this
 is
the
Correct article usage
a
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 positive development where advantages are
supassed
Correct your spelling
surpassed
than
Change preposition
by
show examples
 its disadvantages.
The
Correct article usage
A
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 number of
students
are
Change the verb form
is
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 going
to
Remove the preposition
apply
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abroad
fo
Correct your spelling
for
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acheving
Correct your spelling
achieving
 their higher degree.
Therefore
, they are enable to learn different lessons which will
be help
Change the verb form
help
show examples
 them in
carrer develepment
Correct your spelling
career development
 and
also
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
will
Verb problem
apply
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contribute future progress of the
country
 in various sectors.
For instance
, in Bangladesh,
people
 who are working as
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
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 are trying to achieve their Doctor of
Philosopy
Correct your spelling
Philosophy
 (PhD)for their professional purposes. Again, a significant amount of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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people
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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select the USA for their PhD and at the same time the USA offers
better
Correct article usage
a better
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 scope in research
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
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.
However
, when
people
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
return
their
Change preposition
to their
show examples
 own
country
 they serve their
country
 by contributing
in
Change preposition
to
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 different research areas and
teach
Wrong verb form
teaching
show examples
 their
students
. So they
plays
Change the verb form
play
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 a crucial role in teaching and research areas.
Moreover
, many
students
 want to go to developed
country
 from development
country
 to learn
application
Fix the agreement mistake
applications
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 in
cutting edge
Add a hyphen
cutting-edge
show examples
 technologies.
Furthermore
, in that
country
 , they have
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
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completed different vocational courses which help them in creating job sectors after return. To cite an example, the numerous number of
students
 in
Banglades
Correct your spelling
Bangladesh
, go to
china
Capitalize word
China
show examples
 for different diploma courses which assist them in future
entrepreneur
Fix the agreement mistake
entrepreneurs
show examples
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
contribute in countries development by establishing
farm houses
Correct your spelling
farmhouses
show examples
.
To conclude
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 abroad offers
students
 to learn different new skills which help them in their personal
progressment
Correct your spelling
progression
 and
also
 give them an opportunity to their own
courtries
Correct your spelling
countries
, so its advantages
outweiged
Correct your spelling
outweighed
outweigh
 the dis advantages.
Submitted by priankajun on

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Language
Work on improving grammatical accuracy and spelling. Small errors can sometimes confuse the reader. For example, check 'persing' instead of 'pursuing' and 'fo acheving' instead of 'for achieving'.
Ideas
Provide more detailed examples and explanations to support your points. This will strengthen your arguments and make them more convincing. For instance, explaining how students apply new skills learned abroad in their home countries with specific cases might help.
Logical Structure
Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports the main topic. While you discuss various aspects, tie them back to the essay question directly.
Task Achievement
You present a clear stance on the issue (agreeing that studying abroad is a positive development).
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay has a structured introduction and conclusion, making your argument clear from start to finish.
Supported Main Points
You provide relevant points about the benefits of studying abroad, such as career development, country contributions, and technological advancements.
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