More and more people are using computers and electric devices to access information, so there is no need for printed books, magazines and newspaper. To what extent do you agree or disagree？
Nowadays, numerous issues and topics are subject to debate.
One
such
topic is that books
and magazines are becoming useless these days, as most of
Change preposition
apply
the
people are accessing Correct article usage
apply
information
throuh
Correct your spelling
through
computer
and other Fix the agreement mistake
computers
electroic
devices Correct your spelling
electronic
such
a
Correct your spelling
as
kindle
. I completely agree with Capitalize word
Kindle
this
statement because in this
modern era of technology, accessing information
through internet
and Correct article usage
the internet
computers
are
more quicker and accurate.
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
To begin
with, one
prominent aspect of accessing information
through computers
is that it is very quicker
and can Correct word choice
quick
accessible
. Add a missing verb
be accessible
Thesedays
, almost Correct your spelling
These days
every
Replace the word
everyone
one
has access to computer
in their residence and searching for Add an article
a computer
the computer
information
are
quicker and Correct subject-verb agreement
is
time
efficient. Correct quantifier usage
more time
Furthermore
, informations
can be easily accessed at any time of the day from any corner of the world through Change the wording
information
pieces of information
computers
. However
, one
has to go buy books
and magazines everytime
depending on the opening time of the bookstore. Replace the word
every time
For instance
, an electronic device such
as Correct article usage
a kindle
kindle
is very accessible to carry for travellers and read wherever they go.
Capitalize word
Kindle
Additionally
, another notable feature of using computers
for information
such
as daily news is that it is very cost effective
as compared to buying Add a hyphen
cost-effective
Add an article
a newspaper
newspaper
every Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
morninng
. Correct your spelling
morning
One
can easily access news and information
online for free through computer
, Add an article
a computer
the computer
instead
of wasting money and papers everyday
. Replace the word
every day
For example
, one
research in america
showed that Change the capitalization
America
expense
Correct article usage
the expense
on
daily Change preposition
of
newspaper
declined drastically after free news was introduced on Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
Add an article
the internet
internet
.
Critics argue that reading Capitalize word
Internet
books
and newspaper
are more realistic for students as they are in physical form and Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
one
can not ignore it because few students might find it hard to focus on computer
Add an article
the computer
a computer
due to
other distractions available in
Change preposition
on
internet
.
In conclusion, Correct article usage
the internet
due to
its being more
quicker and Change the word
apply
cost effective
, I strongly believe that the benefits of using Add a hyphen
cost-effective
computers
to access as compared to books
are indeed too great to ignore.Submitted by ashmamrzn on
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Language Accuracy
Make sure to maintain a consistent tone and style throughout the essay. "Thesedays" should be separated into "These days," and "Throuh" should be corrected to "through."
Language Variety
Vary sentence structures to enhance readability. For example, try combining shorter sentences for a smoother flow.
Development of Ideas
Develop your ideas further in certain parts of the essay to provide a more comprehensive argument. This applies to the point about accessing information being quicker and the comparison between digital and physical reading materials.
Structure
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which help frame the main ideas efficiently.
Use of Examples
You've used relevant and specific examples, such as referencing the kindle and research from America, to support your argument about cost efficiency and accessibility.
Acknowledgment of Counterarguments
You have identified and acknowledged the opposing viewpoint, which demonstrates balance in your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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