IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that public libraries are no longer important, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #libraries
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Many
people
 argue that public
libraries
 have lost their charm and are no longer useful for
the
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society.
However
, I am of the opinion that
libraries
 still serve as the ultimate source of education and knowledge.
This
 essay will discuss both points of view. There are a number of reasons why public
libraries
 are losing their importance. First of all,
the
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modern technologies have changed the way
people
 access and gather information. Rather than spending hours in
library
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the library
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,
people
 choose to browse and access information through
internet
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the internet
show examples
.
Secondly
, it has been seen that general
libraries
 do not have updated resources and
also
the
Change the word
their
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 database records
of
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them
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are not satisfactory. These are the primary reasons why
people
 are losing interest
going
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in going
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 to
libraries
.
However
, public
libraries
 still provide the average
people
 with all kinds of knowledge and information to all parts of
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
. First of all, public
libraries
 play a fundamental and significant role in education. They always provide
people
 with books and other materials which they can use to enhance their literacy skills.
In addition
, public
libraries
 help to build social connections.
For example
, many
libraries
 organize workshops where
people
 can participate freely and share their ideas which reflect the social bonding in the community. In conclusion,
although
 there are a few drawbacks
in
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to
show examples
 public
libraries
, I believe that the importance of having public
libraries
 is still enormous for the
people
 who want to read physical copies of books and build up socialism.
Submitted by sa.sabbir25 on

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task achievement
Include more specific examples to support your points. This would strengthen the argument in favor of libraries.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly to the next. Consider using linking words or transitional sentences to help with the flow.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which aids in presenting the main argument effectively.
task achievement
You have addressed multiple aspects of the topic by discussing both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
There is a logical structure to the essay, with clear arguments and counterarguments presented.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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