IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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This
Linking Words
 line graph illustrates the average change month by month in the prices of three metals in the year 2014. Generally speaking, these three types of metal had
high
Add an article
a high
show examples
 correlation
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
 their price
variation
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, in the given period, Zinc remained
reletively
Correct your spelling
relatively
 steady among the others
while
Linking Words
 nickel saw the most
of treamdous
Correct your spelling
tremendous
fluctuaion
Correct your spelling
fluctuation
fluctuations
. As presented, nickel has the highest
variation
Use synonyms
 rate in
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
January, but it plummeted from January to June. The value of January and June was 6% and -3%, respectively.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the value rose up to -1% in the next month
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and remained steady until October. In
these period
Change the determiner
this period
these periods
show examples
,
Use synonyms
variation
Correct article usage
the variation
show examples
 of
nickle
Correct your spelling
nickel
 was the lowest than other materials. The
variation
Use synonyms
 of Copper and Zinc was less than nickel, but they
surpass
Wrong verb form
surpassed
show examples
 it by around May and
Fabuary
Correct your spelling
February
 respectively.
Although
Linking Words
 the price
variation
Use synonyms
 of copper
wasn't
Verb problem
didn't
show examples
fluctuated
Wrong verb form
fluctuate
show examples
 as others, it
surpass
Wrong verb form
surpassed
show examples
 the others in June.
To conclude
Linking Words
, most of the metals showed
Correct article usage
a down
show examples
down trend
Correct your spelling
downtrend
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, all of their value
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 no significant change
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
after 1 year went by.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words variation with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "change" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuate
  • volatile
  • stability
  • peak
  • trough
  • increment
  • decrement
  • steady
  • gradual
  • sharp
  • increase
  • decrease
  • month-on-month
  • average monthly change
  • commodity
  • benchmark
  • trend
  • precipitous
  • plateau
  • significant
  • marginal
  • surge
  • dip
  • plummet
  • soar
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