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Band 3.5

road transport is taking over rail service. discuss the positive effects of this development. is this situation true for your country?

#road #transport #rail #service #effects #development #situation #country
Increasing
Add an article
An increasing
The increasing
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 amount of motor vehicles
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 making people use
roads
 more often, as easier means of transport, reducing the usage of trains.
While
this
 development seems sophisticated for vehicle owners, it has some environmental drawbacks. The current state of my country is discussed in
this
 essay. There are many advantages of commuting through
roads
 rather than railways.
Firstly
, a person or a business can have the luxury of time,
while
 a person can commute on their leisure, a business can deliver,
transport
Correct word choice
and transport
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 goods over a short distance quickly and efficiently
while
also
 accessing remote
location
Fix the agreement mistake
locations
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 where rail
route
Fix the agreement mistake
routes
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 cannot reach. On the downside, environmental effects, a train can carry hundreds of
passenger
Fix the agreement mistake
passengers
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 and
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
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 of trains
are operating
Wrong verb form
operate
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 on electricity eliminating emissions,
while
vehicle
Add an article
the vehicle
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 runs on fossil
fuel
Fix the agreement mistake
fuels
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 which is the major contributor
of
Change preposition
to
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 pollution and
green house
Correct your spelling
greenhouse
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 gases, and as the number of
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
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 user increases the carbon emissions increases with it,
also
while
 the trains can operate during the harsh weather, it is difficult to drive during rain and snowy days.
To conclude
, road transportation in
canada
Change the capitalization
Canada
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 has the edge over rail transport, as the rail network is not as vast as the road network, there
are
Change the verb form
is
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 numerous remote
location
Fix the agreement mistake
locations
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 which can
be access
Change the verb form
be accessed
show examples
 only through
roads
,
this
 is why both options have pros and cons but
roads
 are more
efficent
Correct your spelling
efficient
.
Submitted by bhat.shweta17 on

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure the essay clearly distinguishes between the positive effects and environmental drawbacks in separate sections.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in framing the discussion.
task achievement
The response takes a balanced view by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of road transport.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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