IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The top diagram represents the way access to an area hospital in 2007 ,and directly below the subsequent growth and expansion in 2010 of the same diagram throughout 3 years.
Overall
Linking Words
, there
are
Wrong verb form
have been
show examples
 several changes
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the baths over 3 years and there are new structures
were
Wrong verb form
have been
show examples
 built . The
plan
Change the verb form
planned
show examples
 development of the city hospital faced
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
substintial
Correct your spelling
substantial
 growth and modifications,
as well as
Linking Words
, the
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ring road
remained
Wrong verb form
remaining
show examples
 stable
a
Change preposition
for a
show examples
period of time.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the
puplic
Correct your spelling
public
 car park
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 constructed with
entrance
Add an article
the entrance
an entrance
show examples
 in the west of it. From 2007 to 2010 Two roundabouts were built , one of them in the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 of the map and it linked with
Bus
Correct article usage
the Bus
show examples
 station.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the bus station
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
 connected
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
seconed
Correct your spelling
second
roundabout in the city hospital.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there’s a gate in the southwest of
ring
Correct article usage
the ring
show examples
 road for
Staff
Correct article usage
the Staff
show examples
 car park.
Bus
Correct article usage
A bus
show examples
 stop was added between the two roundabouts
throughout
Change preposition
over
show examples
 3 years.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Contractions: Don't use contractions.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "diagram" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic flow
  • road access
  • ring road
  • bus stops
  • bus station
  • congestion
  • parking facilities
  • pedestrian crossings
  • vehicular flow
  • organizational structure
  • accessibility
  • enhancements
  • configuration
  • dedicated
  • diverting traffic
What to do next:
Look at other essays: