IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You recently organized an all-day meeting for your company, which took place in a local hotel. In their feedback, participants at the meeting said that they like the hotel, but they were unhappy about the food that was served for lunch. Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In your letter • say what the participants liked about the hotel • explain why they were unhappy about the food • suggest what the managers should do to improve the food in the future

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 letter with regard to give you some feedback got from our guest, who are really not happy about the
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 of lunch.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma after the subordinating conjunction Although. Consider removing the comma.

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 our guests are really happy with your polite and active
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff

It seems that staffs may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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, they got every
types
Change to a singular noun
type

The singular quantifier every is followed by the plural noun types. Consider changing the noun to the singular or using a different quantifier.

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 of help they wanted. Not only that but
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 your hotel evening activity was really enjoyable
to
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 them. Mostly they like your clean and tidy hotel
a
Correct article usage
the

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 most.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, most of them
were come
Change to the active voice
came
have come

It appears you have attempted to use the intransitive verb come in a passive voice construction. Consider writing the sentence in the active voice.

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 from a long distance, so they were too
much
Correct quantifier usage
apply

It seems that quantifier use may be incorrect here.

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hungry but whatever
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 you served
were
Change the verb form
was

The verb were does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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 not heavy
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 like rice and meat. Our participants found that most of the
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 was fast
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 or juice. So, those foods
were
Verb problem
did

There may be a verb use issue here.

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 not meet their expectations. I would like to suggest
you
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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that when it
is come
Change to the active voice
comes
has come

It appears you have attempted to use the intransitive verb come in a passive voice construction. Consider writing the sentence in the active voice.

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 to
serve
Wrong verb form
serving

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb serve. Consider changing it.

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food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 you should consider the
guests
Change to a genitive case
guest's
guests'

It appears that the word guests should use the genitive case. Consider changing the noun.

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 origin and timing.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, if you have most
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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Asian
guest
Fix the agreement mistake
guests

It seems that guest may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 you should serve Asian
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, like fish or meat etc.
Also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, if you can add variety
in
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
 your buffet
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 it will fulfill the
guests
Change to a genitive case
guest's
guests'

It appears that the word guests should use the genitive case. Consider changing the noun.

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 expectations. Kind regards, Md Monirul Khan Haidher

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples or suggestions to enhance the detail of your response.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph clearly conveys a single main idea to improve clarity.
coherence cohesion
The letter's greeting and closing are appropriate and polite, maintaining a formal tone.
task achievement
The letter addresses all parts of the task, covering what participants liked, their issues with the food, and suggestions for improvement.
task achievement
The writing tone is suitable for a formal letter to a manager.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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