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Writing Samples
Band 8

For a long time art has been considered an essential part of all cultures in the world. However, nowadays people’s values have changed, and we tend to consider science, technology and business more important than arts. What do you think are the causes of this?

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In contemporary society, the fervent enthusiasm for the
arts
Use synonyms
 is gradually being supplanted by a more practical focus on science and technology.
This
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 essay aims to present a couple of perspectives to illustrate the reasons behind
this
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 phenomenon.
To begin
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 with, advanced technology has brought tremendous practical benefits to modern society, often overshadowing the contributions of traditional
arts
Use synonyms
. Innovations
such
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 as the internet, social media, and artificial intelligence have transformed nearly every aspect of people's lives by providing unparalleled convenience, which traditional art forms cannot offer.
Furthermore
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, the rise of popular culture has achieved unprecedented success, particularly in movies, games, and animations, which are increasingly regarded as modern forms of artistic expression.
Moreover
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, the impatience prevalent among people today plays a significant role in diminishing their appreciation for the
arts
Use synonyms
.
For instance
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, platforms
such
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 as TikTok and Instagram have taken the world by storm, fostering a culture of instant gratification. The overwhelming exposure to a constant stream of information has eroded the modern generation's ability to reflect and appreciate the subtleties of traditional art, resulting in a diminished sensitivity to its beauty.
However
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, from another perspective, it is evident that the
arts
Use synonyms
 have evolved significantly in form in the modern era compared to the past. As mentioned earlier, the means of expressing beauty and delivering messages have shifted from traditional formats,
such
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 as poetry and painting, to contemporary mediums like movies and video games. Famous literary works have been adapted into films, providing new ways to experience classic narratives.
In addition
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, video games have introduced more explicit and immersive storytelling, enabling audiences to engage more deeply with life-like scenarios and fostering stronger emotional connections. In conclusion,
while
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 the apparent neglect of traditional art remains a topic of debate, it is undeniable that the
arts
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 have found new and innovative mediums for expression.
This
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 evolution ensures that artistic creativity continues to thrive, adapting to the preferences and technological advancements of the modern world.

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to further strengthen your points. For instance, mentioning a particular movie or video game that serves as a modern form of artistic expression could help illustrate your argument more clearly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph smoothly transitions into the next to maintain a clear and logical progression of ideas. While your essay is generally cohesive, focusing on seamless transitions can enhance readability.
task achievement
The essay effectively addresses the topic, providing insightful perspectives on the shift in values from traditional arts to science and technology.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is clear, with a well-defined introduction and conclusion that effectively frames the argument.
coherence cohesion
Your use of language and sentence structure is articulate, aiding in the clear communication of your ideas.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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