IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graphs below give information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010. MARzhan Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graphs below give information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010. MARzhan Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#graphs #information #computer #ownership #percentage #population #level #education #years #marzhan #summarise #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Bart chart represents the amount of people who had a
computer
Use synonyms
 between 2002 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can clearly seen that every two years
computer
Use synonyms
ownership
Use synonyms
 steadily increased. In 2010 the personal portion who had
Use synonyms
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
 more than 2002.
Additionally
Linking Words
 when the level of education increased
computer
Use synonyms
 education raised up as well. In 2002, the percentage of people who owned computers was just under 60 It is
clearly
Change the word
clear
show examples
 that when people had better education device
ownership
Use synonyms
 gap between 2002 and 2010 decreased.
Peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
People
show examples
 without high school diplomas used computers more than 40%. In 2010, the percentage of
computer
Use synonyms
ownership
Use synonyms
 was almost three times higher than in 2002. Over the span of eight years, high school graduates nearly doubled their rate of
computer
Use synonyms
ownership
Use synonyms
. Meanwhile, the percentage of college students who owned computers rose from 60
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words computer, ownership with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: