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Band 6.5

The graphs below give information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010. MARzhan Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graphs below give information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010. MARzhan Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Bart chart represents the amount of people who had a
computer
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 between 2002 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can clearly seen that every two years
computer
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ownership
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 steadily increased. In 2010 the personal portion who had
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computer
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computers
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 more than 2002.
Additionally
Linking Words
 when the level of education increased
computer
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 education raised up as well. In 2002, the percentage of people who owned computers was just under 60 It is
clearly
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clear
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 that when people had better education device
ownership
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 gap between 2002 and 2010 decreased.
Peoples
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People
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 without high school diplomas used computers more than 40%. In 2010, the percentage of
computer
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ownership
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 was almost three times higher than in 2002. Over the span of eight years, high school graduates nearly doubled their rate of
computer
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ownership
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. Meanwhile, the percentage of college students who owned computers rose from 60

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words computer, ownership with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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