Some people believe that children should be given lessons on how to manage money in school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some people believe that
children
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should
enroll
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enrol
show examples
in
money
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management
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lessons in school. I disagree with
this
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idea because
parents
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should
also
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teach their
children
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money
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knowledge
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and government sectors should provide financial
management
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knowledge
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to
children
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in the country.
To begin
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with,
parents
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should teach
money
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management
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knowledge
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to their
children
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because
children
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will understand clearly and apply
knowledge
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to real-life situations easily.
For example
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,
parents
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can give some
money
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to the
children
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daily, weekly, or monthly and tell them to budget their income and expenses in school or daily life and
then
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teach them how to control their expenses.
Moreover
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, government sectors should provide financial
management
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knowledge
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to
children
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in the country because
this
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will help
children
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understand financial
management
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knowledge
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automatically.
For instance
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, Providing learning materials through media
such
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as television, radio, or publishing.
This
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can help to know about financial
knowledge
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not only
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children
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for children
show examples
but
also
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for others
show examples
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
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populations in the country.
To conclude
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,
although
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children
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should learn
money
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management
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in school, I disagree with
this
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because it should taught by their
parents
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for
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to
show examples
understand clearly and the government sector should
also
Linking Words
provide financial
knowledge
Use synonyms
to
children
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.
Submitted by peeranat.phum on

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Work on providing a more balanced view, possibly acknowledging the merits of the opposing argument.
coherence and cohesion
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coherence and cohesion
Enhance the logical flow by explicitly outlining how each paragraph contributes to your overall argument.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which effectively frame the argument.
coherence and cohesion
Ideas are presented in a clear sequence, which helps guide the reader through your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial literacy
  • budgeting
  • savings and investment
  • financial responsibility
  • school curriculum
  • mathematics integration
  • social studies
  • debt prevention
  • credit score
  • wise financial decisions
  • parental responsibility
  • structured education
  • real-world experiences
  • internships
  • personal finance
What to do next:
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