Children are more likely to talk to their pets about their problems, than their siblings" (Source: BBC) Nowadays more and more pet owners consider their pets as a member of their family. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

There is a report showing that children seem to be more willing to talk to their
pets
about their problems rather than sharing with their siblings. Meanwhile, more families consider their
pets
as
a
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apply
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member
Fix the agreement mistake
members
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of
family
Add an article
the family
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. In my opinion, I totally agree with
this
statement.
Pets
are friends of
human
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humans
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, and they have become an important element
for
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in
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maintaining humans' mental and emotional well-being. The reason why
people
start to talk to their
pets
more is because
pets
are great listeners. They simply listen to
human's
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human
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complaint
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complaints
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and they do not make any
judgement
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judgments
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.
On the other hand
, telling problems to friends or family members sometimes makes things worse, as they might give unpleasant
feedbacks
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feedback
show examples
.
Therefore
, more individuals find
pets
more reliable for keeping secrets and sharing
complaint
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complaints
show examples
. In recent years, the trend of pet café has aroused significant popularity among
people
, as they offer
human
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humans
show examples
a sense of healing, which helps some
people
to be mentally healthy.
In addition
,
pets
can play diverse roles in a family. They could be a companion with
elderly
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the elderly
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, and at the same time, be the best
player
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players
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with kids. Studies reveal that an elderly living with
pets
has less possibility to feel lonely and
also
being
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be
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more physically active.
For example
, the need
of
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for
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walking dogs can bring old
people
to go outside for a stroll, which enables them to retain good health condition. As for kids,
pets
are friends that have limitless energy and can play with them for a long time.
Moreover
, breeding
pets
can help promote
the
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domestic intimacy, putting every family member closer. Personally, I do see a lot of families treating their
pets
as their family
member
Fix the agreement mistake
members
show examples
, and I believe it is a positive trend, as more and more
people
are respectful to animals and taking good care of them. In conclusion, I firmly agree with the phenomenon of humans' closer relationship with
pets
.
People
seek
for
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apply
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a sense of understanding through talking to
pets
and
this
has helped them lessen emotional pain.
Furthermore
, breeding
pets
makes a family more united and healthy, potentially cultivating a sense of responsibility toward animals in
the
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apply
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society.
Submitted by a0979181071 on

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task achievement
To enhance your task response, try to include more specific examples or studies that provide evidence for your claims. This would strengthen your argument and provide a more balanced viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
In terms of coherence and cohesion, ensure each paragraph smoothly connects with the next. Using transitional phrases could improve the flow of your essay.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction effectively sets the tone for the essay and addresses the task prompt.
supported main points
The essay provides relevant points about why pets are seen as family members, supported by examples such as the popularity of pet cafés and the benefits to elderly people.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points, reinforcing your agreement with the statement.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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