Many people believe that watching a live performance is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is unarguable that watching a live performance
offer
much more Correct subject-verb agreement
offers
pleasurable
for the audience than watching it on television, others claim that it requires extra effort both time and money in order to appreciate the soon-to-be-broadcast Replace the word
pleasure
show
. Hence
, I strongly agree with the former statement as it leaves a life-long experience in our brain will be elaborated on in this
essay.
To begin
with, it seems sensible for some to believe that watching performances broadcasting
on media Wrong verb form
broadcasted
are
more enjoyable than struggling to see Correct subject-verb agreement
is
it
live. Correct pronoun usage
them
This
is possibly becuase
watching a Correct your spelling
because
show
at
Change preposition
apply
require
much effort Correct subject-verb agreement
requires
such
as buying tickets, travelling fees or searching for proper outfits to participate in particular
events. Take classical, For examples
; wearing formal attires Fix the agreement mistake
example
are
considered as a good Correct subject-verb agreement
is
ettiqute
.
Correct your spelling
etiquette
However
, I personally argue in favour of watching the show
live will
remark Correct word choice
and will
the
unforgetful moments seeing that it Change preposition
on the
offer
face-to-face engagement between the performers and audiences. As a matter of fact, it is widely known that our memories will Correct subject-verb agreement
offers
last
longer in our brain
if we Fix the agreement mistake
brains
engaged
in any situation Wrong verb form
engage
as a consequence
of the connection of our sensory
and Replace the word
senses
that
experiences. Based on my own experience, I used to watch the Correct determiner usage
apply
show
in
either offline Change preposition
apply
and
onlineCorrect word choice
or
one
, I came up with the conclusion that the live performance is worth the investment as the Correct pronoun usage
apply
show
will forever be in my memories whenever I think about with.
In summary, although
it is undeniable that the struggle to watch live can be burdensome for some people, I am of the opinion that those
money spent Correct determiner usage
the
worth
the Add a missing verb
is worth
pay back
as Correct your spelling
payback
these involvement
will marked in your brain and create an endless memory that we could Change the determiner
this involvement
retelling
for our Change the verb form
retell
be retelling
descendant
.Fix the agreement mistake
descendants
Submitted by kamonluck1999 on
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task response
Try to ensure that all parts of the essay question are adequately addressed and balanced. At times your essay leans more towards narrative rather than deeply analyzing both viewpoints.
coherence cohesion
Work on organizing your ideas more logically in paragraphs. Use clear topic sentences and transitions to guide the reader through your argument. Improving this will make your essay easier to follow.
task response
Provide more specific examples to support your main points. This will help to better illustrate your argument and improve the strength of your task response.
coherence cohesion
You present a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument nicely.
task response
Your argument about lasting memories and engagement from live performances is relevant and intriguing, showing insight into the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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