You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. People believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

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Taxes
provide the
government
with revenue to fund public
good
Fix the agreement mistake
goods
show examples
and health, some argue that the local
authority
Fix the agreement mistake
authorities
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have no
right
to have
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
show examples
and they would rather keep the money to themselves than
giving
Wrong verb form
give
show examples
it to the
government
,
although
I highly disagree with
this
belief, as paying
taxes
bridges the gaps between the haves and the have-nots, it is an attempt
also
to share the burden of economic growth. First and foremost, paying
taxes
will help the
government
in the development and maintenance of infrastructure, building new schools,
hospitals
Correct word choice
and hospitals
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and maintaining roads.
Moreover
, funding local
government
entities like police, fire stations and public parks will benefit the
overall
society.
For example
, Norway is ranked for its best healthcare system in terms of quick medical services, medications and
hospital
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hospitals
show examples
. They believe that everyone has the
right
to better health, regardless of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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age, nationality and even gender in return the people pay 40%
taxes
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
their monthly income.
On the other hand
, some critics argue that paying
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
show examples
is of no use and they prefer to keep the money for their personal needs. But
this
is not the case, as
taxes
can
also
help poor people to have a chance for a better living, make sure that their children will guarantee a place in schools and
will
Verb problem
apply
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offer them the
right
to be medically treated as they can’t afford expensive medicines and hospitals, which will lead to equality and a mental stable society that all their basic needs are settled.
For example
, during these Corona times, the nation realized the need for
great
Add an article
a great
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improvement in the health & Medicare sector in our country.
Inconclusion
Correct your spelling
In conclusion
show examples
paying
taxes
is vital for a better society, it will enhance
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
economic growth and will assist the
government
with all the
suggested
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suggestions
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for a better country and better people. Every citizen or resident has the
right
to
fulfill
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fulfil
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his basic needs. We need
taxes
to run a country, it is not a privilege but a duty.
Submitted by Mido  on

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task achievement
Ensure that examples directly support the argument. For instance, include more details about how tax systems contribute to social programs, and make sure every example directly supports the point being made.
coherence cohesion
Refine your use of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transitions and clear connections between paragraphs and ideas. Proofread to ensure there are no abrupt changes in topics or ideas.
overall language use
Introduce more paraphrasing and sophisticated vocabulary to elevate the quality of writing. Also, work on reducing repetitive phrases and word choices.
task achievement
The argument is clearly stated, and a clear position is maintained throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay provides a logical flow of ideas and clear organization, with distinct paragraphs for each separate point.
introduction conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates the writer's stance, leaving a strong final impression.
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