Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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To control poverty in some poor
countries
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one of the main solutions is that
development
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developing
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countries
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give
money
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to them
while
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,
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apply
show examples
there are other positive solutions which are more practical. I agree that
development
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developing
show examples
countries
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can have
effective
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an effective
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role
,
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apply
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if they
will
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apply
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invest
inside
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in
show examples
the poor
countries
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and
make
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create
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more job opportunities rather than giving
money
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. It is observed that
,
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apply
show examples
financial
helps
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help
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from developed regions can be robbed by politics in developing
countries
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.
That is
Linking Words
why
in
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apply
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most of the time
money
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cannot
effort
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afford
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beneficial
Correct article usage
a beneficial
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lifestyle for people
of
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in
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those areas.
For example
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, every year the amount of
money
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has been sent to Africa by many
Charites
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charities
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in developed
countries
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however
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, none of the financial problems or
people
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people's
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poverty have not solved.
In addition
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, sometimes these financial
helps
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help
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spend
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spent
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on
unscary
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the unscary
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field
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fields
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due to
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lack of management. On the other side, poor
countries
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can ask
to
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for
show examples
help in
a
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an
show examples
other way,
for instance
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, investigation of rich reigns in different areas can
has
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have
show examples
effective impacts for both sides.
Due to
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increasing
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the increasing
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rate of investigations job opportunities will
be risen
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rise
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in that society,
furthermore
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, the
amount
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number
show examples
of experts and imports will change in
following
Correct article usage
the following
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years.
For example
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,
stablish
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establishing
a
brunch
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launch
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of
NIKE
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the NIKE
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brand in
the
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apply
show examples
India has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
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created lots of job opportunities in recent decades. In conclusion, In my
opinion
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opinion,
show examples
it is a good way to help poor
countries
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with
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in
show examples
other type
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another type
other types
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of ways
,
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apply
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because that
kinds
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kind
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of
helps
Change the wording
help
bits of help
show examples
will continue over the years and many people can
get
Verb problem
apply
show examples
benefit from that.
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Coherence and Cohesion
Structure your essay more clearly by organizing paragraphs around a single main idea and using clear topic sentences to guide the reader.
Task Achievement
Make sure all parts of the question are addressed thoroughly, including discussing different types of aid other than financial.
Task Achievement
Support your points with more specific and diverse examples to strengthen your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay contains an introduction and a conclusion that relate to the topic.
Task Achievement
You have addressed the prompt by agreeing that developed countries should provide other forms of assistance besides financial aid.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • poverty alleviation
  • economic inequality
  • developing nations
  • foreign aid
  • sustainable growth
  • technical assistance
  • expertise
  • infrastructure
  • education
  • fair trade
  • trade barriers
  • sustainable development
  • environmental conservation
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