Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organizing group activities in their free time. How do you say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Parents attempt to organize their
kids
'
activities
to utilize their leisure time productively. Generally, folks encourage their wards to indulge in events to improve their interpersonal skills.
However
, some people persuade their
kids
to take individual
activities
to teach competencies to rely on themselves in every situation. Since organ group
activities
, involve playing in squads, the participants learn cooperation, and discover the essence of healthy competition among peers. Groups are a platform for exchanging thoughts among the members, which post confidence to speak in front of
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
and assists in developing the ability to put ideas across others. They get the opportunity to observe and understand the shortcomings and
strength
Fix the agreement mistake
strengths
show examples
of their contemporaries.
Furthermore
, children playing as a team acquire significant life lessons
such
as leadership,sacrifice, compassion, and discipline.
On the contrary
,
kids
who pursue solitary interests are always more confident in making independent decision decisions. They learn to learn to navigate through complex circumstances without relying on help from others, which enhances their mental faculties to respond swiftly. Children who don't work
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
in groups have better
self understanding
Add a hyphen
self-understanding
show examples
.
Therefore
,
this
makes them mature enough to take responsibility
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
their actions. I reckon the group
activities
are conducive to children's holistic, mental and physical development. They gain several attributes
while
participating in groups, which are prerequisites to achieving personal growth in different spheres of life. A child must perceive the activity from which they drive enjoyment during idle time. As a man is a social animal, parents must strive to encourage
kids
to indulge in team events.
Submitted by arvindpreet5040 on

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your points. For instance, mention particular activities or scenarios in which group participation can enhance children's skills.
coherence cohesion
Ensure logical flow between ideas. Avoid using some repetitive phrases like 'learn to learn', it can confuse the reader
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced view by discussing both group activities and individual activities.
coherence cohesion
Good use of linking words and phrases to show contrast and conclusion, such as 'however' and 'therefore'.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well structured, providing a clear opening and closure to your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • occupied
  • organized
  • group activities
  • benefits
  • social
  • teamwork skills
  • interpersonal skills
  • friendship
  • discipline
  • time management
  • interests
  • hobbies
  • independent play
  • creativity
  • problem-solving skills
  • self-reliance
  • explore
  • discover
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