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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph below shows the production levels of the main kinds of fuel in the UK between 1981 and 2000. Summarize the formation by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the production levels of the main kinds of fuel in the UK between 1981 and 2000. Summarize the formation by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The line graph illustrates three main kinds of fuel
petroleum
Use synonyms
, coal and natural gas in the United Kingdom over the
period
Use synonyms
 of 19 years from 1981 to 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, both the proportion of
petroleum
Use synonyms
 and natural gas witnessed upward trends
while
Linking Words
 the figure for coal experienced a contrasting movement over the given
period
Use synonyms
. The amount of energy produced by
petroleum
Use synonyms
 started at 95
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 of oil,
then
Linking Words
 decreased noticeably which was followed by a sharp rise to 140
million
Use synonyms
 in 1996. To the
last
Linking Words
 of the
period
Use synonyms
 in 2000, the production levels of
petroleum
Use synonyms
 climbed slightly and peaked at 142
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 - one of the biggest levels in 3 kinds of fuels.
In addition
Linking Words
, the proportion of natural gas increased minimally and remained unchanged at around 39 to 40
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
. In the next 5 years,
this
Linking Words
 data
also
Linking Words
 witnessed a dramatic growth of 43
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 but later rose slightly by 101
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in 2000.
Finally
Linking Words
, the date of coal
also
Linking Words
 started at 80
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but later dropped remarkably and hit a bottom at 38
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
. From 1986 to 1991,
this
Linking Words
 figure for coal
maintained
Add a missing verb
was maintained
show examples
 at around 60
million
Use synonyms
, which led to
fluctuate
Replace the word
fluctuation
show examples
 at around 60
million
Use synonyms
 in
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 5 years and declined slightly by 2
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
at the end
Linking Words
 of the
period
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words petroleum, period, million, tonnes with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 3 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • production levels
  • fuel types
  • trend
  • fluctuating
  • dominant
  • period
  • rise
  • decline
  • context
  • spikes
  • drops
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