The table below shows the percentage of men and women employed in four different types of industries in one twon in 1990, 2000, and 2010.
The table compares the
Men
and Women
in terms of employment in four categories called : manufacturing, health
, retail shops and tourism
in 3 particular years.
Overall
,while
in Women
the highest level was tourism
,in Men
it was manufacturing.
To begin
with, in 1990 Men
were at 13% in retail shops,however
, Women
were at 7%. Health
in Men
was at 7% while
in Women
at 9%.When Women
’s manufacture was just at 7%,in Men
’s this
index was a record high percentage at 30%,at 10% less was in Women
.The last
type of employment was tourism
in Men
’s it was 13%, 10% more was in Women
.In 2000 and 2010 the retail stores didn’t change and it was at 13%,in Women
it was similarat
8and 9%.The Correct your spelling
similar
similar at
health
in 2000 was the same as in 1990, however
, in 2010, it grew a little to 9%.Whenever in 2000 Manufacture was more than Tourism
at 15 and 10%,in 2010 they were equal 10% each.In Women
between 2000 and 2010, the figure for Health
was 11 and 15%.The average figure was Manufacture in 2000’s
at 8%,Fix apostrophe usage
2000s
whereas
in 2010 it dropped to 3%.The last
index was Tourism
between 2000 and 2010 there are some differences, at 25 to 27%.Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, last, while".
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women, health, tourism with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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