The table below shows the percentage of men and women employed in four different types of industries in one twon in 1990, 2000, and 2010.

The table below shows the percentage

of men and women employed in four different types

of industries in one twon in 1990, 2000, and 2010.
The table compares the
Men
and
Women
in terms of employment in four categories called : manufacturing,
health
, retail shops and
tourism
in 3 particular years.
Overall
,
while
in
Women
the highest level was
tourism
,in
Men
it was manufacturing.
To begin
with, in 1990
Men
were at 13% in retail shops,
however
,
Women
were at 7%.
Health
in
Men
was at 7%
while
in
Women
at 9%.When
Women
’s manufacture was just at 7%,in
Men
’s
this
index was a record high percentage at 30%,at 10% less was in
Women
.The
last
type of employment was
tourism
in
Men
’s it was 13%, 10% more was in
Women
.In 2000 and 2010 the retail stores didn’t change and it was at 13%,in
Women
it was
similarat
Correct your spelling
similar
similar at
8and 9%.The
health
in 2000 was the same as in 1990,
however
, in 2010, it grew a little to 9%.Whenever in 2000 Manufacture was more than
Tourism
at 15 and 10%,in 2010 they were equal 10% each.In
Women
between 2000 and 2010, the figure for
Health
was 11 and 15%.The average figure was Manufacture in
2000’s
Fix apostrophe usage
2000s
show examples
at 8%,
whereas
in 2010 it dropped to 3%.The
last
index was
Tourism
between 2000 and 2010 there are some differences, at 25 to 27%.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, last, while".
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women, health, tourism with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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