in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? dos you think this is apositive or negative situation?

In some countries,
people
prefer to have a
house
than to rent a place. In
this
essay I will explain some of the main reasons
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
why
this
is a positive development.
One
of the main reasons is the stability. Some
people
tent
Correct your spelling
tend
show examples
to less worry because they don’t have to think about paying rent every week. Another reason is
long term
Add a hyphen
long-term
show examples
investment. Buying a
house
could be
one
of the
long term
Add a hyphen
long-term
show examples
investments and it is cheaper than renting. Some
people
choose to buy a
house
even with
payment
Add an article
a payment
show examples
plan for years, even though the monthly pay is higher than regular renting,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it is still counted as
cheaper
Add an article
a cheaper
show examples
option because they will be the owner of the
house
after years of
payment
.
On the other hand
, renting a place requires regular
payment
as long as they stay in the place.
On the other hand
, there are some drawbacks to owning a
house
like
maintain
Wrong verb form
maintaining
show examples
expenses and a large sum of money for the deposit as the initial
payment
to buy a
house
. The
maintain
Replace the word
maintenance
show examples
cost of the
house
could be
one
of the
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
why
people
choose to rent.
This
high cost can be
avoid
Wrong verb form
avoided
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
if we build the
house
with good material and
well
Correct article usage
a well
show examples
plan so renovation is not needed. In regards to the deposit for the initial
payment
, consulting with the manager property about our financial condition could be a good choice. In conclusion, owning a
house
helps with financial stability and could be
one
of the investment instruments that
good
Add a missing verb
is good
show examples
for our future.
Although
there are drawbacks to having a
house
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
in my opinion
this
is a positive development.
Submitted by kkomariyah92 on

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task achievement
To enhance task response, try to provide more specific examples that illustrate why owning a home is important in certain cultures, as this will help to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on varying sentence structures and improve transitions between points to improve coherence and cohesion.
introduction conclusion
The essay provides a clear introduction and a strong conclusion, effectively framing the discussion as a positive development.
logical structure
The main points are logically structured and well aligned with the topic, offering a coherent flow of ideas.
supported main points
You have effectively identified key reasons why owning a home is preferred, such as stability and long-term investment.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Homeownership
  • Financial security
  • Investment
  • Appreciation
  • Cultural symbol
  • Personal achievement
  • Legacy
  • Inheritance
  • Predictability
  • Community roots
  • Stability
  • Status
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