Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#employers #people #jobs #information #hobbies #interests

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In the modern era, many organizations are well-developed and updated, so the employees are asking the workers about their personal details like hobbies, interests and marital status. Some

people

Use synonyms

think it is useful and others disagree with

this

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statement. In

this

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essay, we will discuss both views.

To begin

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with, some

people

Use synonyms

agree with the statement of employers who are asking about the personal information of employees because they think it will be more beneficial for their company.

For instance

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people

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get their bank loans easily because of the age and experience details of the employer.

Additionally

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people

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can apply for family medical insurance and

also

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provisional funds.

Moreover

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, employers can organize some training programs based on experience so

this

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kind of benefit is based on the employee's personal data.

On the other hand

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, some

people

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are against the employer’s requirement

due to

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some personal data being shared with banks and the bank staff are forcing employees to get loan offers.

For example

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, my close friend, recently got a personal loan offer from the bank

then

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he is now struggling to pay the money.

Apart from

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this

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people

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are thinking about sharing too much of personal details which will be a scam.

To conclude

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, today’s world companies are well-developed and updated. Some

people

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think sharing personal information with the organization is a good thing for getting insurance, loans and training programs. Others are scamming money from the workers. Both should be encouraged and it is based on everyone's situation

Submitted by saravanan.ko2011 on Sun Nov 24 2024

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task achievement

Ensure your main points are well-developed with clear and detailed examples. Currently, the essay presents valid points, but they could be backed with more specific and detailed examples to illustrate your arguments more effectively.

coherence cohesion

Refine the sequence and connections between sentences and paragraphs. While the essay is generally cohesive, there are areas where transitions could be smoother for improved logical flow.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes both an introduction and a conclusion, effectively framing the discussion.

task achievement

You address both perspectives on the topic and provide a balanced view, which is essential for fulfilling the task response.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

249 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

job application
personal information
hobbies and interests
marital status
relevant
useful
privacy
assessing candidates
qualifications
experience

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Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Your opinion

nowadays many people choose to be self employed rather than to work for a company or organization. why might this be the case? what could be the disadvantage of being self-employed

In some places old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Dicuss both view and give your opinion.

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Now people spend less and less time at home. What are the causes? What are the effects on individual and society?