The bar and line chart below shows average monthly temperatures and bathing suit sales in New York for the first 6 months of 2012.

The bar and line chart below shows average monthly temperatures and bathing suit sales in New York for the first 6 months of 2012.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The bar and line chart below shows average monthly temperatures and bathing suit sales in New York for the first 6 months of 2012.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The graphic gives information about the average temperature in New York and
also
Linking Words
revenue which was generated from
sales
Use synonyms
of bathing suits. All of the information is from the first half of 2012. Not surprisingly we can see that the coldest months were those which were in winter, when the temperature rising steadily throughout spring and into summer.
However
Linking Words
, the warmer weather does not seem to result in an increase in bathing
suit
Use synonyms
sales
Use synonyms
. Revenue from bathing
suit
Use synonyms
sales
Use synonyms
started fairly strong at the beginning of the period and rose steadily over the first three months from ten to fifteen million dollars.
After
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
sales
Use synonyms
shooted
Correct your spelling
shot
show examples
up with revenue doubling in April.
Then
Linking Words
sales
Use synonyms
decrease
dramitcally
Correct your spelling
dramatically
over May and June.
Overall
Linking Words
, we can see that most people prefer to buy a bathing
suit
Use synonyms
in the winter and spring months with bathing
suit
Use synonyms
sales
Use synonyms
are
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
relatively poor in the summer.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, suit with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: