IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

You have bought some clothing online and are not satisfied with your purchase. Write an email to the company that you bought the clothing from. In your email, give details of the purchase describe the problem explain why you need a replacement urgently Write at least 150 words.

#purchase #email #company #replacement
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Dear Sir, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express my dissatisfaction regarding the purchase which I
did
Verb problem
made
show examples
 recently from your website. Now I want you to take immediate action on it.
Actually
Add a comma
Actually,
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 I am in
habit
Correct article usage
the habit
show examples
 of doing online shopping. I came to know about your website from one of my friends. I ordered one
medium sized
Add a hyphen
medium-sized
show examples
 winter jacket and two sweatshirts for the upcoming winter. You offered a 30% discount on it and I instantly ordered it without thinking twice. My order number is LA-6790. Undoubtedly, you delivered my items on time but my
excited
Replace the word
excitement
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 turned into
disappoinment
Correct your spelling
disappointment
 when I found
problem
Add an article
a problem
the problem
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in
Change preposition
with
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 these products. The jacket which I ordered was medium but it comes in
small
Correct article usage
a small
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 size and the
color
Change the spelling
colour
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 of both sweatshirts was not the same as I ordered. Even I want these sweatshirts with round
collar
Fix the agreement mistake
collars
show examples
 and these came in V-shaped. I want you to replace these items frequently or
otherwise
Linking Words
 refund me
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 full amount. If you are unable to respond
me
Change preposition
to me
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 within a week
then
Linking Words
 I will lodge your complaint in
Consumer
Correct article usage
the Consumer
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 Rights Commission office. I will be very grateful to you. I am looking forward to
hear
Change the verb form
hearing
show examples
 from you soon! Yours faithfully, Sam.
Submitted by kaurjagdeep2097 on

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language
Pay attention to certain grammatical errors and word choice issues such as "frequently" replaced with "quickly," "disappoinment" with "disappointment," and "hear" with "hearing."
coherence cohesion
Consider adding a paragraph structure for a clearer visual representation of each point discussed, which will improve the logical flow of information.
task response
You successfully addressed all parts of the task by providing purchase details, describing the problems, and explaining why a replacement is needed urgently.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear, ensuring the email is well-framed with a strong call to action.
task response
Specific examples are used effectively to support your explanation of the problem, such as mentioning the order number, the size, color discrepancies, and how the style doesn't match the order.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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