In a number of countries, some people think it’s necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, there is a pervasive belief among a high number of people in many countries that building
new
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a new
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railway between cities is worth spending
money
.
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on.
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While
others strongly
belive
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believe
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that making an improvement on existing transportation is much more necessary. Since
money
should
be spend
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be spent
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on all
frastrations
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frustrations
frustration
of
city
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the city
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, both mentioned sides will be discussed in the following paragraphs.
To begin
, it should be noticed that improving
exsisting
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existing
public transport is a time-consuming way.
In other words
, if a country tries to improve
builing
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buildings
, it will save a great deal of time for other projects.
Further
, when an old construction is built, the government can be able to take more time on other aspects of
city
environment improvement and people life quality.
Besides
, Not only does it decrease costs, but it
also
saves more
money
for making new things in the whole
city
.
However
, it should not be forgotten that building
new
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a new
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railway always needs high
expenture
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expenditure
and some countries may afford to pay
it
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for it
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in order to
economical
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economic
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problems.
Therefore
, it turns into an
immence
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imminent
challenge that
government
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the government
show examples
has to tackle
it
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apply
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using
monetray
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monetary
pressure on residents.
In addition
, lack of
money
enough causes
the
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apply
show examples
mental and
behaviour
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behavioural
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disorders for either society or
individual
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individuals
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.
To conclude
,
although
some people
belive
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believe
show examples
that building new construction is worth doing because of
great
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the great
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impacts
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impact
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on
city
features, others think repairing
old
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the old
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one is a better option.
Consequently
, both
point
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points
show examples
of
views
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view
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has
ben
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been
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shown a lot of positive and negative effects that
Add a missing verb
were disscussed
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disscussed
Correct your spelling
discussed
in the previous sentences.
Submitted by mziarati2 on

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structure
Work on structuring your arguments more logically. Present your points in a clear sequence and use transition words to guide the reader.
evidence
Ensure that all main points are well-supported with specific examples or evidence. This strengthens your argument and shows depth of analysis.
clarity
Clarify your language to make your ideas more clear and comprehensive. This will help convey your points more effectively.
structure
You have provided an introduction and a conclusion, showing the ability to frame your discussion within clear boundaries.
task
You have addressed both sides of the argument, which demonstrates an understanding of the task requirement to discuss multiple perspectives.
content
Your essay touches on relevant points such as economic considerations and improvement of public transport, indicating awareness of essential issues.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • investment
  • urban mobility
  • commuters
  • sustainable
  • environmentally friendly
  • accessibility
  • rejuvenate
  • cost-effective
  • traffic congestion
  • economic sustainability
  • tourism
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