Task 2 Nowadays children mostly spend time playing computer games rather than sports,Is it a positive and negative development?

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Shift
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The shift
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towards children spending more time playing
computer
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games
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rather than participating in sports is a complex development with both positive and negative aspects. On the positive side,
computer
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games
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can offer significant benefits.Many
games
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require thinking. Some
games
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even promote creativity and storytelling through game design.
Furthemore
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Furthermore
,gaming can
faster
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foster
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a sense of community and social interaction.
This
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can be particularly
benefical
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beneficial
for children who might struggle to form social connections in traditional settings.
Additionally
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,exposure to different cultures
though
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through
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online
games
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can broaden their horizons and enhance their
understund
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understand
of the world.
However
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,the negative aspects of excessive
computer
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game playing
equally
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have equally
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significant benefits .Lifestyles resulting from prolonged screen time
contirbute
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contribute
to a range of health problems including poor eyesight.
Moreover
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,some
games
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contain violent content that can
necatively
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negatively
impact a
child
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child's
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emotsional
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emotional
and physical activity associated with excessive gaming can
also
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the development of crucial physical skills and
overall
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physical health. In
conclution
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conclusion
,
while
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computer
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games
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can offer certain cognitive and social benefits the potential negative consequences related to physical health
as well as
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addiction to inappropriate content are significant and cannot be overlooked.
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task achievement
Ensure that all sections of your essay are evenly developed with clear support for each point. The main points are identifiable, but require more specific examples and comprehensive ideas to fully achieve the task.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen coherence by focusing on a single idea within each paragraph. Although logical development is present, it needs enhancement with more organized sentence structure and transitional signals.
language
Avoid minor grammatical inaccuracies and improve your vocabulary usage to enhance clarity and precision, as well as the academic tone of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion which effectively frame your discussion on the topic.
task achievement
You acknowledged both the positive and negative aspects of the given situation, demonstrating an awareness of the complexity of the issue.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • allure
  • captivate
  • supervise
  • accessible
  • scarcity
  • safer alternative
  • peer pressure
  • educational tools
  • cognitive skills
  • implications
  • obesity
  • poor posture
  • hand-eye coordination
  • problem-solving abilities
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